What Would It Take For You To Change?

Wonderless

Chapter 19: Wonderless

~Vic's POV~

I awoke before Jenna. She had a tear stained face and was curled up into a ball. I want to make her feel better.

I snuck out of the bed and went to the kitchen. If Jenna is going to get better she has to eat. I decided to just make her some granola and yogurt with strawberries. Something small and light.

The guys were still asleep so I thought Jenna could have breakfast in bed. I went back to our room and gently woke her up. "Morning beautiful" I smiled. She rubbed her eyes and groaned a little while trying to sit up. "Morning" she said her voice was small.

"I know you don't normally have breakfast but I thought we could share this" I said showing her the bowl of food. It was just a small amount, enough for one person, but I thought that if we shared it would make her feel better about herself because she wouldn't know how much she ate.

"Oh" Jenna sounded sad, "I guess" she tried to give me a small smile but you could tell how forced it was.

"Come here" I said as I pulled her into my arms as we were leaning against the wall. I put my arm around her shoulder and she laid her head on mine. "It's just gonna be a few bites." I said as I put some yogurt on the spoon and brought it up to her lips. She looked at me, like she was hoping she wouldn't have to eat it but I wasn't going to let that happen. "Here comes the airplane" I said as I made a buzzing sound. I know how cheesy it was but it got Jenna to smile and open her mouth.

"I love you" She said

"I love you too" I replied, Jenna took the spoon from my hand and said "My turn" She fed me a bite but pretended she was a train. This turned into a giggle fest. Jenna and I were taking turns feeding each other and making sounds.

When the bowl was empty I gave Jenna a kiss and told her how proud I was.

"It makes it easier when we share" She admitted.

"Then I will forever share with you as long as you want me too"

"I'm going to shower" Jenna told me as she gave me one more kiss before climbing out of bed and grabbing some clothes.

~Jenna's POV~

I feel disgusting now. It's cute how Vic is trying but I hope he doesn't do this at every meal. I got into the bathroom with my bag of stuff and emptied it on the floor, not caring at the mess I would have to clean up. At the bottom of my bag I had hid my scale, knowing that there wasn't one on the bus. 113lbs. I'm so close to my goal. But now with Vic watching my food intake how am I supposed get there?

I got into the shower trying to control my thoughts. Having food in the morning really got my mind racing. I felt so full even though I only had a few bites. I started to panic. I hopped out of the shower soaking wet and collapsed by the toilet. I lifted the lid and stuffed my fingers down my throat. The shower was still running so I didn't bother trying to muffle the noise. As I emptied the contents of my stomach I felt horrible. I haven puked up a meal in months. I never had a reason to; because I was the one always controlling what went in.

I really don't want to lose Vic, so I guess I could go back to purging. That way I can get to my goal weight for him.

I got back into the shower and washed quickly. Once I got out I put on my OM&M shirt and some black leggings. I did my hair and makeup trying to conceal my puffy eyes from crying so much. I cleaned up the bathroom from my mess and hid the scale back in the bottom of my bag. When I went back to Vic's room I was surprised to find Vic still lying in bed on his computer. I thought he would be out hanging with the boys.