What Would It Take For You To Change?

I Never Meant To Be Your Pain

Chapter 30: I Never Meant To Be Your Pain

~Jenna's POV~

Yesterday turned out to be so perfect but when I woke up this morning I remembered that Vic and I couldn't just keep pretending nothing is wrong. We had to at some point face the problems in our lives. Well it's more I have to figure out what I want to happen with my health and face the consequences that come with it, and Vic has to smarten up and stop avoiding Tony, even though he denies that he it.

Vic was still half sleeping in bed so I decided that I should probably get up and shower. I went to the bag I brought with me full of clothes and started digging around. I hadn't realised it when I took the bag but I brought the one with my scale in it. I couldn't help but stare at it. It was just sitting there in my bag, waiting for me to step on and see the number that makes me hate myself.

As I continued staring getting lost in thought, I remembered that Vic now knows that I have it. I remember the sad look he had on his face when he saw it yesterday, but he didn't say anything. I half expected him to get angry and break it or something.

"Babe?" Vic asked, bringing me out of my thoughts.

"huh?...oh um I was just getting ready to shower." I said shaking my head a little to try and shake the thoughts.

"okay, can I get a good morning kiss?" Vic asked, trying to draw me away from my bag, because I couldn't stop staring, but he didn't mention it.

"Always" I said with a small smile. I quickly picked out some random clothes and shut the bag before walking over to the bed to great Vic with a kiss. When I kissed him I felt instantly better. It was like Vic's kisses were the medicine to my mind.

Vic tried to deepen the kiss but I pulled away smiling, "I need to shower, we can do that later" and with that I went to the bathroom.

~Vic's POV~

I started to wake up when I felt Jenna leave the bed. I opened my eyes a little to watch her go about trying to be quiet as she went to pick out her clothes for the day. She seemed sort-of happy when she got out of bed but when I re-opened my eyes from a long blink she was just sitting by her bag staring inside.

She looked like she was in some sort of trance, I wondered why for half a minute but then I remembered. I had seen the scale yesterday when I went to get her clothes. I didn't want to mention it yesterday because we were kinda just pretending that nothing was wrong. But I knew I'd have to confront her about it soon, and by soon I mean at some point this morning. I still haven't told her that the doctor said I have to blind weigh her every day. I didn't do it yesterday because of how upset she was, but I knew that we'd both get in trouble if I didn't start doing it soon.

After I noticed she was still staring I called out to her. Once she noticed that I saw her, she quickly grabbed some clothes and came to give me a kiss upon my request. I tried to deepen it but she pulled away and left to shower.

Once I heard the water running, I got up and went to her bag. I took out the scale and just sat on the bed staring at it, contemplating what I was going to say. This situation could go one of three ways; she could be understanding and allow me to do it without any problems, or she could get upset and it could make her start sneaking around again and find ways lie, or she could end up pretending that she's okay but ending up getting worse than ever. Oh god why do I always let my mind wander into the worst scenarios.

My thoughts were going crazy when I heard the shower turn off. It's now or never. I walked over to the door and it took me a few attempts but I got the courage to knock.

"Yeah?" Jenna called out.

"Jenna, can you let me in, I, umm," I couldn't finish whatever I was trying to say because Jenna open the door. The smile on her face quickly faded when she saw the scale in my hand.

"Oh.." Jenna sighed.

"Sweetie, I don't want to make you upset, but the doctor told me that I ummm" I was really struggling for words here but thankfully Jenna helped me out.

"Well I agreed to listen to what you say, so" She took the scale from my hands and put it on the floor. She was about to step on it but I quickly stopped her.

"Wait, umm, you're umm,"

"What?"

"You have to go on backwards because I'm not allowed to let you see the number" I said maybe all too quickly.

"Oh" Jenna sighed, before turning around. She was being good about all this and I knew it was it was killing her inside.

There was a pained expression on her face, but she took a deep breath and gave me a shaky smile. When she got on I quickly looked at the number to make this awkward situation end faster.

I tried to hide my facial expression when I saw the number. I put it into my phone so I could keep track, but I was still in shock from what I just saw. 102lbs. How could she get this thin?

I didn't have much time to think about it because Jenna stepped off the scale with a sad sad look in her eyes.

"You're perfect no matter what the number is sweetheart." I tried to cheer he up a little but I know that it's nearly impossible.

"Thanks" She said in a quiet voice before leaving the bathroom.

I called out to her and told her that I was quickly going to shower and that she should think of something fun she wants to do today. She just lazily got into the bed and waited for me to get ready.