My Saviour

(33) "YOUR BOOBS ARE SPILLING OUT OF YOUR SHIRT!"

Chapter 33- Kayla’s POV

I had been awake for hours.

I just lay in bed with tears falling down my cheeks. I tried to sleep; more than once but I failed miserably. Every time I closed my eyes images of today flashed in my head. I tried not to sob out loud so I don’t wake Cole up but I couldn’t hold it in any longer.

Go kill yourself

You’re worthless

Kian pitied you

Just die

All her words kept repeating in my head.  All I wanted to do was die but I knew I couldn’t do that to Cole. I’m the only family he has left. I would have to be a monster to do that to him.

“Kayla?” Cole asked.

I didn’t reply.

“Kayla, I know you’re awake.” Cole turned me so I was facing him. “Stop thinking so much, Lexi is a b*tch and we all know it. Don’t listen to a word she said. We all love you and you know that. I don’t know what I would do without you; you’re my only family Kayla. Please don’t leave me. I want to take all your pain away but I can’t. I wish it was me who was going through this and not you. I love you so much Kayla.” Cole put his arms around me and held me tight; I knew he was crying because his voice was cracking.

“I’m not worth it.” I whispered feeling too weak to say anything else.

“Yes you are, you don’t realize how amazing you are and I wish you did. Everyone cares about you, why can’t you see that?” Cole looked me bang in the eyes.

I didn’t reply.

Cole just sighed as he hugged me burying his head into my neck.

“You need to go to school.” I informed Cole. “I’m not coming today.” I told him looking at the time.

“I’m not leaving you on your own.” Cole looked at me sternly.

“Please go, I don’t want to hold you back.” I tried to get Cole to understand.

“Kayla.” He groaned.

“You’re supposed to listen to your older sibling and I’m telling you to go to school.” I ordered him while he looked at me weirdly.

“Are you sure you’re okay? It’s okay to not feel okay.” Cole kissed my forehead as I snuggled into him.

“I’m fine Cole, trust me.” I replied giving him a soft smile.

“Why don’t I believe you?” Cole asked raising his eyebrows.

“Because you’re stupid. Now go have a bath, you stink.” I pushed him off the bed giggling to myself. He got back up and glared jokingly at me.

“Fine, I’ll ask Jessica to come look after you.” Cole smiled.

“I don’t need someone to look after me Cole, I’m fine.” I repeated myself growing frustrated that he thought I couldn’t take care of myself.

“Kayla that’s not what I meant, I just want to make sure you-“

“Make sure I don’t cut myself or even worse kill myself?  I don’t need anyone to look after me.” I cut him off feeling irritated. I’m not unstable.

“That isn’t what I meant.” Cole tried to calm me.

“Just leave me alone, I don’t want to talk to anyone.” I pushed him out of my room.

“You’ll eventually have to Kayla.” Cole shouted through the door.

After I shut my door I jumped on my bed burying my face into my pillow. I hate this, I hate feeling like this.