Little White Lies

Chapter 17

"Andy? Can you come over? No, this is bad. I need you to come over now. Okay, just let yourself in. We're downstairs," Autumn hangs up.

"Sawyer?" she says cautiously, kneeling down. "Just breathe, okay?" Autumn sits down on the floor next to me and wraps her arms around me, hugging me to her. "It's going to be okay, just breathe."

I'm having a full blown panic attack. I'm not even sure how I got here. I vaguely remember dropping the twins off at Joey's to catch the bus. I told them I had to come here to help Autumn carry in a project that wouldn't fit in her car. I had it all together until I started driving here from Joey's. All I'd meant to do was come talk to Autumn before school, but by the time she opened the door I couldn't breathe. Luckily her parents are both teachers and they'd already left for the morning. I try to focus on my breathing like she says, but I can't seem to get enough air into my lungs.

I hear a door open, then slam shut and footsteps above my head. "Autumn? What's wrong?" I hear Andy call as he jogs down the stairs. "Holy shit," is all he says when he sees me.

"What the hell is going on?" he sounds as panicked as I feel.

"I don't even know. She just showed up. No call or anything. When I opened the door she was freaking out. I didn't know what to do so I called you."

"Go grab a glass of water?" Andy suggests. "I don't really know either."

Andy sits down next to me, "Sawyer? What's wrong? Sweets, we can't help if you don't tell us." He starts rubbing my back in slow circular motions. I still can't get the words out, I just shake my head. Andy scoots closer and pulls me into his lap, hugging me tight. "Whatever it is, it's going to be okay. I promise. Breathe," he tells me continuing to rub my back. "Hey," he say, kissing my hair, "focus on my breathing okay? Breathe with me. There nice deep breaths."

"Anything?" Autumn asks when she walks back in.

I feel Andy shake his head, but he doesn't let go. I try to focus on his breathing and his calm words and slowly my breathing starts to even out. I take the water from Autumn, "Thanks," I manage to whisper.

No one says anything for a few minutes while I try to compose myself, but finally Andy breaks the silence, "Sawyer?"

I look up at him, I'm scared to tell him. Saying it out loud will make it too real.

"Sawyer, what happened?"

"They're engaged," I say tears streaming down my face.

"What the actual FUCK?!?" Autumn exclaims suddenly, breaking the silence. "I have bread that was good before their relationship began that is still good."

I actually laugh at that but that laugh quickly starts to become hysterical. Breathe. Deep breaths.

"Breathe sweets," Andy says calmly, but one glance at his face tells me he's in shock too.

"Okay," Autumn says then pauses. "So, first are you okay? Do you need anything? More water? A shot of rum? A shot gun? We don't actually own one... but Oliver's dad has one. It's decorative and from World War II but I bet it would do the job."

"Thanks, I think I'll skip all of those things for now. Though lets table the idea of rum and a gun." I've never even had a drink before but this seems like an appropriate time to start drinking.

"So, okay, I'm sorry if you're okay to talk about this now, I think I need more details," Autumn said sliding down the wall across from us. "When? How? WHY?"

"I don't even know yet. She came home last night around 11pm. I was finishing up in the kitchen and she came in, set down and talked to me. I showed her the pictures you took on my phone. We talked about Will. I asked about her weekend. All she said was the beach was quiet, it was relaxing, and they ate at a couple of really good places," I pause to take a sip of water.