Lost in time G.D E.D

60

A few months have passed and things are going normal. The boys aren't out doing their rebel missions, Ethan isn't on those fucked up pills, and Grayson is still in love with his locker girl.

On one of Grayson's days off from work he begs me to stay late after school.

"Please Liv, I really need to find out who the girl is," he looks at me with puppy dog eyes.

"I don't wanna be cooped up in here all night Gray, what if the girl comes in the morning?"

I ask as we stand in the hall by the locker I sent him to hide my notes in.

"I'm always here as soon as school opens, she's never once been here in the morning. I have to find out who she is, she's my soulmate," he explains.

"What if you see her and find out she's not the girl you want, like shes Jade Carter or Sammy Andrews or something?"

"The girl in the notes is the woman I love, I don't care who it is," he persists.

"You should be careful Gray,"

"I am," he sighs and we wait as everyone else leaves the school. We sit alone in the empty hallway.

Its nice being alone with him, even if he's waiting on a girl who will never come.

I really wanna reach up, kiss his cheek, and tell him the truth. Or to get up, put in the locker combo, and just grin at him.

I want him to know how much I love him back.

"She's not coming Gray," I say around 6.

"She will," he persists.

"I can't stay all night Gray, Ethan's getting me after work," I remind.

"Then you go, I'll stay," he persists and I frown, knowing he'll be here alone waiting for nothing.

"Gray," I sigh.

"Go on, I'll be here," he sighs and shoos me. I get up and leave walking towards my apartment where Ethan will be at 7.

We're supposed to go out for dinner for our 6 month anniversary. I'm wondering how things will end in April, if Ethan will have a wife or girlfriend in 2017 and if she'll be the same girl who replaces me after I leave.

I wonder who will take my place after I go.

I get back home and dress up a bit not knowing where we're going. I wait for him while I think of poor still at school.

The car pulls up outside and I grab my hoodie about to come out and meet him but instead he gets out and comes up to my door with a pizza box in his hands. I let him in instead.

"I gotta pizza after work, half no cheese," he reassures me.

"Cool, wanna watch a movie?" I ask as we sit. I turn on Halloween and we start eating.

"You know what Grayson's dumbass is doing? Sitting at school waiting for his locker bitch," he laughs,

"Its probably just a prank,"

"Its not a prank, theres a girl out there who loves Him, he just wants to meet her," I defend him.

"Right, who would love creepy old Grayson," he snorts. My fist clenches on the side of the couch so he can't see.

"Who would love you? What makes you better than him?" I glare pissed.

If he kills me for this I'll let Death take me. Or maybe have one final timeline with Grayson before I say my goodbyes.

"You do babe," he smiles and wraps his arm around my shoulder. I drop the subject not wanting to be killed.

After the pizzas gone and the movies over I turn the tv off and prepare for him to go home. I'll probably sbeak out and try to check on Grayson, or even reply to his latest letter if he's gone.

"Come here," Ethan waves me over as I put plates in the sink. I walk over and sit by him. He leans forward and kisses me.

I gently hold his cheeks and kiss him back. He roughly pulls me closer and onto his lap.

"Careful," I mutter breaking the kiss. He leans forward and resumes it until I pull away again. He moves his hands to my waist and I try to pull away,

"No Eth, don't,"

"Shh," he almost hisses and leans forward again. I lean my head back turning to the side.

"I said no Ethan," I shake my head. He tightens his grip on me and pins me to the couch. I glare at him annoyed,

"Ethan!" He puts a hands on me and holds me down. I start crying as I try to push him off.

"Its okay Liv," he whispers and I continue trying to push him with my knees but he's too strong.

He reaches into his pocket and pulls out the knife he stabbed Grayson with long ago.

"Get off!" I cry. I close my eyes waiting for the radiohost to announce my 29th timeline.

I'd rather him fucking kill me at this point.

I waited 45 years for this, nearly taken by Phil, wanted to wait for Grayson, stolen by Ethan.

I cry and shut my eyes tightly, as he was threatening to stab me.

"I love you," Ethan tells me replacing his hand with his lips kissing me after.

Knowing I need to do this for Grayson I kiss him back and don't break up with him.

He helps me up and washes my blood off his knife.

"I love you too," I look down and wrap in a blanket, one that Grayson gave me.

I hold myself tightly trying to relax and calm down. Ethan throws away the old tattered clothes. I watch him carefully everytime he walks by.

"I had fun tonight," he hugs me outside the blanket. I nod pretending I agree. I think back to his journal entries, he probably thinks I actually enjoyed it.

Shit, if I admitted the truth would he feel bad? Would he understand what he did was wrong? Or would he take it the wrong way and try to kill me?

"I'm sleepy," I tell him yawning, knowing fully well I'm leaving after he does.

"Okay babe, I'll head home," he kisses my temple and smiles at me before leaving.

I lock the door behind him and I slide onto the floor hugging my knees. I look up as the black hooded figure enters through thick mist.

"You here to make fun of me?" I ask looking up.

"Are you ready to give up, if you give up now I'll take all of your memories too, you won't remember anything after your shooting,"

"Fuck no. I'm a better person, I want to know that. I want to remember Grayson. Even if I do die we'll probably end up in the same place in the afterlife. I'll suffer with him. So fuck you, I'm not giving up," I get up on shakey feet and walk passed him, through the mist, and into my room to dress.

I leave the apartment and walk back to the school. I hear snores and frown seeing Grayson curled up in a ball by the locker.

I put in the combo really fast and quietly open the locker to find his note.

'Im waiting for you by this locker, if you're reading this I was either told to leave by a teacher or I urgently needed to leave. I need to see you, I need to meet you. I need you'

I frown looking sadly down at him. I know he wouldn't hurt me like Ethan would. And I'm hurting him by avoiding our 'meeting' I write out a note as well.

'I'm sorry we couldn't meet I can't wait around. We can't meet yet, it's too dangerous now. I will be here my love, someday. I found you sleeping by my locker, how I wished I could lean down and kiss you awake, be wrapped in your arms and never let you go. I gotta go before you do wake, sweet dreams Grayson'

I hide the note in his locker a few halls away and I run away back to my apartment.