tom holland/peter parker and steve rogers oneshots

pillowforts and pranks- peter parker

<<warning: mild swears. has captain america's language sticker so proceed with caution(･ω･')>>

"WHO PUT GLITTER GLUE IN MY SHAMPOO?" you heard Loki scream from his bathroom. "I WILL FIND YOU, I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN, AND I WILL KILL YOU IF NECESSARY! PATHETIC MORTALS!"

Natasha and Bucky snickered quietly, high-fiving each other.

Not long after his outburst, the God of Mischief came storming into the living room, hair dripping wet---and sparkly.

"Ah, what a beautiful hairstyle that is, brother. It sure suits you," Thor joked, pointing at Loki's glittery locks. He recieved a death glare from him in return.

"Hey, Peter," you beckoned your best friend over to where you stood by the kitchen counter. "Oreo?" You held the plate of Oreos out to him, offering one.

"Sure," he came over and plucked an Oreo from the plate, immediately taking a huge bite of it.

His face contorted into disgust once he realized what he'd really eaten. "What----"

You threw your head back in laughter. "Ha! Toothpaste in Oreos, classic!"

"Oh no you didn't," he chucked the Oreo into the garbage and went charging after you.

You squealed, trying to escape and jumped onto Thor's back. "Save me, God of Thunder! He's trying to murder me!"

"Mister Parker, you must not murder Lady Y/N or---"

A scream from what seemed like Tony's room suddenly interrupted all your bickering.

"WHO THE FUCK PUT TWO GIANT ASS TARANTULAS IN MY BED?!"

"Pete...?" you hopped of Thor's back and turned to Peter, who was trying his best to stifle in his laugh.

"He's never gonna know it was me," he giggled, letting out a tiny squeak!

"And if he does...?"

A panicked look took over his face, his eyes widening in sudden realization. "He...he's going to kill me. Oh god, I'm so dead," he muttered.

Tony slammed the door, rushing out of his room and glaring angrily at everyone. "I'm going to ask this one more time and somebody better fess up unless they want to get crushed. Who...put...these...fucking...tarantulas...in...my...bed?"

No response.

Everyone sat in silence, exchanging awkward glances with one another while at the same time, trying not to laugh because it sure was funny when Tony Stark was pissed off.

Then their gazed all subtly shifted to Peter, who was nervously staring down at the wooden floors, hoping that Mr. Stark wasn't going to burn him alive or worse, feed him to those spiders that he'd snuck into his bed. Because he could probably do that if he wanted to.

"I SAID, WHO PUT---Peter?"

"Sorry Mr. Stark, but the opportunity was just too good to pass up," the boy smiled sweetly.

The enraged expression on his face immediately softened. He couldn't hurt Peter, he just couldn't. Peter was too soft and sweet and innocent.

"I AM STILL HUNTING YOU DOWN, SHAMPOO SABOTAGER!" Loki yelled. "WHEN I DO FIND OUT, IT'S NOT GOING TO BE PRETTY!"

"Sucker," Bucky hissed between clenched teeth. The god turned to face the Winter Soldier, and they stared each other down, arms crossed.

"Oh ho ho ho ho, this is getting spicy," Tony chuckled, an evil grin spreading across his face as he rubbed his hands together.