Fate

Chapter Sixty-Nine

Chapter Sixty-Nine

"Why would I be angry at you?" I questioned.

His green eyes watched me intensely, but they held something I could only decipher as sadness but there was something else. Something deeper than that and I couldn't place it. "You have a lot of reasons." He finally sighed.

He was right of course. It could be said I had reasons upon reasons yet none came to mind right now. Why did he need to ask? Didn't he know?

I could be angry about him giving Sunny the drink but everything turned out fine in the end. He didn't do it to purposely get her drunk and he didn't force her to take or drink it. We'd have an entirely different problem if he did. This was not one of those lifetime movies Liam and I had watched with mom and Kaylin though at this point it could be.

Now that was the last thing I could be angry about. If I were a normal teenage girl with a normal life I could think of this. Perhaps it was kissing and ditching me as Maggie so elegantly said. That would be in common with what Zayn has done. Now that would be what a normal person would be upset about but I wasn't right now. Okay a little bit but barely.

I could be angry about his opinions on George but he wasn't the only one. Lots of people warned me about that and they had their reasons. Good reasons after what he did to me. Not that I could blame him for his past. Mom always said don't judge a person based on their past. I wouldn't want to be judged on my past so I couldn't rightly judge anyone else without knowing them.

It could be him claiming to still love me while seeming to be in love and very happy with Lita. It could be claiming to love me at all after what he'd done. Not just sleeping and cheating with Melinda but attempting to date her afterward. Deciding to occasionally bully others and throw his relationship in my face. It could be all those things but it wasn't. I felt no need to be angry right now and I didn't know why he thought I was. The feeling of anger just wasn't there and it felt nice.

"I don't have any," I shrugged.

"You do," he disagreed.

"I choose not to." I corrected.

He gave me a pained expression. "I don't mean to do those things. What your friend said, Maggie. I wish things could be different." His voice was low and soft and I knew he meant it no matter how wrong his actions were.

"What did she say?" I played dumb.

His eyes shift to the tile floor then back up to me. "Do you know how hard it is to want to kiss you and be with you again when—"

"Aren't you happy with Lita," I cut him off.

"I am but—"

I put my hand out to stop him and he frowned but kept quiet. "No buts. How can all these people love two people? Is that what you're telling me?" I demanded.

"Yes, it is but I love one more than the other." He claimed and my heart leaped but not in a good way. It hurt.

"You love Lita more than me?" I nodded in understanding.

"No, I—"

"Don't," I warned, eyes narrowed.

I couldn't let him do this. Make either of us feel this way or ruin his relationship. I would not allow this to happen if I could help it.

"She's great but—"

"You can't want to kiss me when you're with her. It doesn't work that way and you shouldn't feel that way. You shouldn't," I insisted.

He gave me a wounded look as if I'd just shattered his whole world. It made my chest tighten but I couldn't let him think any of this was okay. I wouldn't do this to him, Lita, nor to myself.