Lapidot: I will always choose you (Human Au)

22

Peridot POV
I saw him in the back, him creeping, lurking, taunting. She lied to me, I know it… it’s barely been a week and she’s already moving one I get that we said we are on a break but I didn’t expect her to go to Jasper in one week! I slam my computer shut hard enough that I probably cracked it, I kicked the stupid fucking chair I snapped I ripped the science posters I just hung up yesterday. I know I shouldn’t have been jealous we agreed on, but that doesn’t stop me from ripping off my sheets. You know what fuck her and fuck Jasper for being her weakness! I knew I shouldn't have fucking moved, it's all my fault… my legs became too weak for me to stand… I couldn't stop it the tears streamed no matter how fast I tried to wipe them I could still see them puddle on my carpet. This is all my fault… my fault… I remember the last time I felt this horrible it was at the big donut when Lapis said those awful things. I manage to crawl to my nightstand where in the drawer contains a small razor in a tiny black box…

Lapis POV
"What do you mean your gonna call her back?" Jasper said scowling me.
"Just because I'm not dating her doesnt me I stopped caring about her" I get up from my chair and walk outside, lucky for me he stopped following probably got a drink another problem I have to deal with. The ringing of the phone kills me I hate it because I want her to answer her phone instantly, so I can hear her perfect voice preach love into my ears. Voicemail?... I never get voicemail… I call again… pick up Peri

Peridot’s POV

TRIGGER WARNING FOR SELF HARM

BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ

For every ring I make a small but deep cut, how dare she think she can call me and act like everything is fine! I am so heated, the blood rushing down my wrist burns or maybe that's the alcohol I poured on it… I don't want to feel this way…

END OF TRIGGER WARNING

BUZZ BUZZ

I want to stop loving you…

BUZZ BUZZ

I hate you!

BUZZ BUZZ

I pick up the phone….

"Peridot?"
"What do you want" it sounded warmer than I wanted but I can't be cold to her… I love her.
"I don't know… I… I felt something was wrong… I just wanted to make sure you were okay"
"Why would you care… aren't you too busy with Jasper?" I sounded more jealous than angry, I know she can hear it too.
"W-what"
"I saw him before we ended the call… you said you wouldn't go back to him… you promise… AND YOU LIED TO ME!" I can hear her cry… hard, it almost made me feel bad… almost.
"Peridot… you should know I wouldn't have gotten back with him if I didn't have any other choice… because you left my father thought I was away for me to get back together with Jasper"
"So this is my fault"
"No it's not it's mine"
"You're right"
"..."
"Lapis I wanted this to work… but it's clear you're not gonna put in the effort for us… I don't want to do this but you really hurt me… I don't want you to call me… or text me… this is goodbye…" I hung up before she could even say a word. This is better, now none of us are holding each other ba-... I fall to the ground… hard…. Black...