The Falling virgin

t w e n t y s i x: a part of me is missing

TRIGGER WARNING; This chapter includes sexual assault. If it's something you can't read, please skip this chapter!

"I like your outfit." Ethan said as she handed me a shot. "Thank you." I said. I took the shot and felt it burn in my throat. "You're lucky my brother is away this weekend, he'd kill me if he saw me taking shots."

"Well, where's Lucas?" Ethan asked. I looked around, trying to find Lucas and spotted him talking with Jane. "Talking with Jane?"

"Do they know each other?"

"Yeah, something like that." I said and Ethan scanned my face. "It's bothering you."

"What? No, of course it isn't. I mean, he said he loved me." I said, getting a little nervous. "You didn't tell me that!" He yelped and I bit my lip. "Well, I did now." I said. "How are you and Lewis?" I asked. "We are dating again and it feels ten times more like a relationship, plus we're more comfortable after yesterday. Turns out we both discovered things we like." He grinned.

"Oh, okay." I laughed. "I'm just gonna head over to Katie, she seems to need some company, I'll see you." He said, heading off in her direction. I walked up to Jane and Lucas. "Hey, Alli, wanna play a game with some others outside?" Lucas asked and I shook my head. "No, thanks. Maybe I'll join later, I just have to use the bathroom."

He kissed my cheek and walked away, Jane right behind him. I went up the stairs, knowing the bathroom downstairs would be reeking like puke. I walked upstairs, Elijah passing me with,a sly grin on his face. When I was at the top I suddenly got pushed against the wall.

"What the fuck." I groaned and Elijah scanned me. "Hey, baby girl."

"Get the fuck away from me." I said, raising my voice. "Don't you wanna have some fun?" He asked, moving his hands under my top. "Get your hands off of me bastard."

"Why? Don't you like it when I touch you like that?" He asked, his lips meeting my neck. I stiffened.

No one was around, no one was gonna hear me cause of the music. "Please, stop." I said, feeling him open the buttons of my pants. I was trying to hold back tears whilst he kept on sucking my neck.

"Hey asshole." A deep voice yelled, jerking him away from me. "What the fuck, Hamilton. We were just gonna have some fun. You know how it goes, right?" Elijah said. "Leave her the hell alone Weiner."

"Why Connor? Doesn't Sanchez have to look after her?" Elijah asked, he was clearly drunk. Connor threw a punch towards Elijah's face, I'm sure I heard something break. There was thick red blood running down his face. "Get the fuck out of here." Hamilton hissed. He watched Elijah get out of the house and then looked at me.

He was catching his breath and we just stared at each other.

Now the tears actually left my eyes and he walked up to me. "Hey, hey, he's gone." He whispered, putting his arms around me. He wiped away my tears with his thumbs. "He won't do anything anymore."

I looked at him. "Thank you." I whispered and he licked his lips. "I know this is really not the moment, but I'm really sorry about acting like a dick all day. I'm really not taking us not talking the right way and I just feel like a part of me is missing. That sounds cheesy, but it's the truth. I haven't been wanting to do shit anymore because I couldn't talk to you. I couldn't mock you or mess around with you. And I know, it's only been a few days-"

"Con, shut up." I said and he frowned. "What?"

My eyes briefly looked at his lips. "I-"

"I know." He said, slowly moving away. "We should probably head back."

"Yeah, we should." I said. He let go of my face. "Connor, I didn't mean any of what I said last week." I said. "Me neither."

"I'm also sorry for-"

"You don't have to say anything, I probably deserved it." He said and stuffed his hands in his pockets. "Wanna head back for some crazy party games?"

I shook my head. "No, I'll pass. I'm gonna find Lucas and home after."

"I'll drop you off." He insisted. "Don't you wanna spend the night with Jane?" I asked and he huffed. "I'm breaking up with her, I mean, I don't think I can handle having a long distance relationship."

I gulped. "Oh."

"Yeah, let's find Lucas." He said and we did find Lucas apparently. "Baby." He said drunkenly. "What took you so long?"

"She had to puke, had too much shots." Connor said, covering the thing that actually happened. "What a coincidence you were there." Lucas hissed. "What the fuck dude." Connor said. "Alli, please tell me you haven't been fucking this guy all along." Lucas turned to me, giving me a suspicious look. "What?" I asked.

"Is that what took you so long?" He asked. "Not cool man, she wouldn't." Connor said. "But you would, any time you'd get the chance to, right Hamilton?" Lucas growled. "Lucas, you're dunk. I was just heading here to tell you that I'm heading home."

"To fuck him again?" He asked. "Lucas, I almost got raped back there while you were getting drunk here." I said, tears coming up in my eyes. Confusion got over Lucas' face. "What? Did he rape you?" He hissed, pointing at Connor.

"Come on Alli, we're getting you home." Connor said, dragging us away from the people that started to get around us. We got to Connor's car and he faced me. "Are you okay?"

"My boyfriend  just accused me from cheating, what do you expect?" I asked, sighing. "I'm sorry."

"No, they all think you raped me now. What are you gonna do?" I asked and he ran his hand trough his hair. "I don't really care what they think." He said, getting into his car.

I looked at him before getting in the car too. "Well, thank you for helping me back there." I said and he bit his lip. "It's the least I could do. You're probably right about me being a dick. I really am one, so-"

I placed my hand over his mouth. "Okay, you can be a real dick sometimes." I said, him rolling his eyes and moving my hand. He didn't let go of it, instead he looked at it whilst he held it in his. "Don't you dare try to apologise again." I firmly said, slowly pulling my hand away.

He chuckled and nodded. "Okay, I'll get you home now."

I turned in my seat and took my phone, seeing a lot of messages and phone calls from Lucas. I sighed and turned off my phone. "You'll have to talk to him eventually, he was drunk." Connor said, taking a turn.

"So what? Drunk men speak true words. He meant it that he thinks I'm cheating on him with you." I said. "His loss." He muttered and I rolled my eyes, a faint smile on my lips. "I guess."

"No, no guessing. It's a fact." He said, looking at me for a second. I shook my head and then placed my head against the window.

We pulled up onto the drive way and got out of the car. Even though it was pretty late, the lights were still on.

I rang the doorbell and Thomas opened. "Thomas?" I asked, he looked at Connor besides me. "Hey, your mom invited us over again."

"Oh, okay. Where is she?" I asked and Thomas shrugged. "She and my dad went upstairs." His eyes widened as he said that, but Connor burst out laughing. I smacked his chest. "Oh my fucking God Con."

"Dear, it was only a matter of time." He said and I scrunched my nose. "I know, just not my mom."

"And my dad." Thomas said as we all walked to the living room. "I'm actually gonna head to sleep now." I said, turning to Connor.

He frowned and Thomas shifted. "I'm just gonna head to the kitchen to do stuff, cause of stuff." He said and left the room. "I should leave." Connor said and I swallowed. "Uhm, yeah, I mean if you want to." I said and his eyes flickered with thoughts. "Do you want me to stay?"

"Only if you want to." I said and he licked his lips. "Yeah, of course." He said and we walked upstairs.

Maybe he wasn't as bad as I thought.

+———+
I miss one direction and I cannot be the only one who feels this waY
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