The Night Of Our Death//Bungou Stray Dogs x Reader

IV-The man who changed

[Y/N] POV
Reader is 15 years old

It's been two weeks already since I've last seen him...

Deep inside, I still miss him... But on the other hand, I don't want to see his face...

I want to hate him, but I can't bring myself to do so...

But he has nothing to do with my father...

But still...

I miss him so goddamn much...

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Time skip
Saturday night, 20xx
Time: around 9 pm

"Yes, grandma. I'm fine. Alright, take care, love you. Tell great-aunt Makiko I said hi"

That's how it went every weekend. My grandmother would leave me all by myself when she went to visit her sister, giving me all of the freedom a kid my age would want and a big goddamn house on my hands.

I ended the call, throwing my phone on the bed as I let myself "drown" in the fluffy pillow that covered my face. I let out a frustrated groan, not knowing what to do.

Maybe if I had friends, we could have thrown a party in the house or at least... Have Dazai-san stay here over the night...

Don't get any wrong ideas, but the saturday nights when we were home alone were so much fun when he was still here...

I pushed him away without letting him explain himself... It's my fault, I must admit it, but... he's, at least, as guilty as I am... I still don't know when guys from the Port Mafia will come to kill me or my grandmother any day by now... I'm scared...

Author POV

You hugged a pillow tightly as your back faced the glass doors of your room's balcony that were slightly opened to let in some fresh air. You closed your eyes, slowly starting to feel sleepy, until you fell asleep, still thinking about him and the time you spent together. You could feel how some tears pricked your eyes, making you hold the pillow tightly. His absence in your life made your world turn cold and monochromatic at the speed of light, making you slowly go back to your old, almost emotionless self. Looks like when the day he walked in your life brought a lot of new emotions you didn't know you could feel... and that made you happy... and you wanted more... it was never enough... you wanted to feel this warm feeling inside of your chest more often, a feeling that, somehow, made you so happy...

But that wasn't going to happen anymore since you pushed him away, not even looking back at him as he tried to reach you with his bandaged hands...

And before you knew it, you felt the warm tears rolling down on your cheeks as you wiped them as fast as you could, letting out a painful sigh.

Your mind started to run to different places and different memories when a faint knock on the glass doors of the balcony made you freeze almost instantly.

You got out from your bed, looking at the silhouette in front of you as you tried to form a coherent phrase, but nothing came out, only some painful sobs as he continued to look at the ground, not even looking up at you.

But when he did look up at you, he saw your puffy, red eyes and got the idea. You've been crying. And you noticed something at him as well... The bandage that was covering his right eye wasn't there anymore and his face was tear stained. Exactly... Someone like him... someone who was always happy in front of you and tried to joke around to make you feel happy... The one that was an executive at the Port Mafia... You never thought that you'll get to see him like this... Of course, he had feelings like everyone else, but he tried to not show them so often.