You're a Mind Fuck, Babe

Chapter 15: It's Not Loving If It's Just Fucking

I sit up in the bed and look at Gerard. He's curled up on himself with no sheets. Where are the sheets? I look down at myself and notice that half are on me and half are on the floor. Oops. I must've been curled up in them. I pick them up and throw them over Gerard's sleeping body. I grab his pack of smokes and his lighter and go outside. I light a cigarette and watch the sunrise as the smoke floats into nothingness.

I finish the cigarette and head back inside. Gerard is still unmoved and I'm still unmotivated so I lay back down beside him. I stare at the ceiling for awhile, unable to fall back asleep. Did I really want sleep though? Sleep opens the possibility of having more nightmares and I don't really want to think about the reality of this situation. Sure, he's my teacher but.... But what? I don't love him. It's not loving if its just fucking. Then why do I feel so fucking happy when he's around? I hate hormones. I'm blaming those fuckers.

When Gerard eventually wakes up, he makes some coffee and then we pack up to leave. We have to get to school tomorrow after all. We're all packed up before he's done his coffee and he stands around until he's drained every drop from his mug.

We hit the road with a less enthusiasm than before. The radio is on but nobody's singing. It's too early for me. And I'm not in the mood. The sky is a beautiful blue today but it's not making me feel any better. The dream is fucking with my head. Mikey is potentially a safer bet than Gerard but... I like Gerard better. Gerard's Gerard and I just can't explain it. I hear a sputter and I see smoke coming from the engine.
"Shit!" I swear.
"Fuck sakes," Gerard hits his hand on the steering wheel trying to pull off the road.

Of course the fucking car would break down 7 hours out of town. We had just started heading home and the engine gives out.
"We're going to have to check into a hotel or something," Gerard states the obvious.
"And get a tow truck. We're never gonna make it for school," I sigh.
"We need to find a hotel with wifi," Gerard says. I raise an eyebrow.
"I have to make a lesson plan and send it into the school for the supply teacher," he explains. I nod. He pulls out his pack of cigarettes and gives me one. He places one between his lips and lights both of ours.
"Why does shit like this always happen to me?" He complains. I shrug.

He calls a tow truck and eventually it arrives. The driver was nice enough to drive us to the closest hotel which looked pretty gross and run down but what can you do?

We check in and head to the room. I don't really want to touch anything here but I guess I'll have to.
Gerard's typing on his laptop and seeing him shirtless in the bed is making me really horny. I climb onto the bed and start kissing his neck.
"You're really annoying, you know that?" He laughs. I rub my hand up his chest and his neck, continuing to kiss his neck. I start sucking on his skin.
"Frank... I'm busy," he sighs.
"Oh come on, work can wait a little, can't it?" I look up at him with puppy dogs eyes. He sets his laptop on the table beside the bed.
"You're such a bad boy," he smirks as he kisses me. He climbs over me, continuing the kissing.
"You know what I do to bad boys?" He asks seductively.
"Do you... Spank them?" I play along. He pulls off of me and flips me onto my stomach. With one swift movement, he pulls my pants and underwear off, exposing my ass.
"Yes, I do," he finally answers. His hand slaps my ass. He draws his hand back and releases it again. I grip the sheets.
"How bad am I?" I ask. He leans down and I can feel him pressed against my back.
"So bad," he whispers. Shivers run down my spine and he lifts off me. I hear the whoosh of the air before I feel his hand hit me again. The pain isn't unbearable but I'm almost at the point where I start laughing. That's how I deal with pain, I laugh. I can't control the laughter. It just happens. His hand descends on my skin again and it stings. A smile forms and I'm biting my lip to stop from bursting out with laughter. This whole situation is so fucked up. I stifle my laughter as his hand hits me again and again and the pain makes me want to laugh and I try so hard not to. I breathe and I feel him pressed against my back again.
"I'll be right back," he whispers.
"Seriously?" I ask, kinda shocked. He gets off of me and I hear the door open and closed. What just happened? I pull my pants back I and sit on the bed confused. Where is he going?