With and Without You (A Jordan Knight Fanfiction)

3

She looked so peaceful laying next to him as she slept. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. He was finally able to really look at her.

There were subtle differences about her face. Now he was able to see she had a scar above her left eyebrow. There was another one at her left eye and temple.  When he traced the scar on her temple she turned her head to the right. There was another thin scar than ran below her ear to her neck. He wonders if she was in an accident. Maybe a car wreck or something. Then he sees a thick, ragged scar below her rib cage.  When he touches this scar she turns over and her right arm falls across her side. 

Then he spots her tattoo, the tattoo doesn't surprise him, its what the tattoo say that surprises him.  I'll Be Lovin You Forever, J.   Oh wow, his first ever single, written for and about her. And the J? J must be for Jordan! She tattooed herself for him! He couldn't stop smiling as he fell asleep next to her.

"Jordan? Jordan are you awake"? He stirred and sleepily said, "No". She laughed, "What are you smiling about in your sleep? Good dream" she asked. He opened his eyes and looked up at her, she was on her side, leaning on her elbow. "I was dreaming about you and that tattoo you've got on your arm" he said through a brilliant smile. She ducked her head, blushing from embarrassment. He put his finger under her chin and brought her face to his, he placed a soft kiss on her lips and whispered, "I love it, Viv".

He traced his finger over the scar below her ribs and asked, "What happened here and here" as he ran his finger over her other scar on her neck. She pulled away from his touch and crawled out of bed saying, "Oh it's nothing, just an accident. Hey you hungry? We can order something to eat and finish up my interview" she said. He smiled as he watched her slip into his sweats and tshirt. He loved how she looked in his sweats and tshirt.  She was sexy in anything she wore. That hadn't changed about her. There were some things that had blatantly changed, she'd grown up to be a beautiful woman. Her body had changed, she had womanly curves now. She had those little scars but they didn't distract from her beauty.  But one of the biggest changes was her eyes, she'd lost that sparkle, the light that use to be there, was gone. He wanted to know where that light went.

Jordan got out of bed and dug around in his suitcase, finally finding his basketball shorts and another tshirt.  He followed her into the living room and they ordered some food. While they waited she pulled out her notepad again. 

"Alright let's see, next question: So Jordan, you've gained a lot of success musically. Are there any other avenues you'd like to explore?"

Jordan thought about it for a minute. "Well I've always wanted to be a singer. But I also always wanted to get married and have kids someday.  Now that I've succeeded as a musician. I'd like to settle down. Not that I couldn't do both. But the music career would have to be put on hold for a little while if I was to become a father. I'd want to be there everyday for my child". He noticed her expression had changed and she looked saddened by his answer. "You okay Viv? Did I say something wrong"?

She smiled and said, "Oh no, not at all. That was a really good answer. Next question: Where do you see yourself in ten years"?

Jordan hated these kinds of questions. His answer would be in print forever, so in ten years, if he wasn't where he saw himself being, everyone would know if he failed or not.  He usually just tried to keep it generic. "Well hopefully still writing and recording my music. And performing for my fans. I also hope to be settled down with a beautiful wife and kids".

She smiled at him and shook her head with a giggle. He was about to say something when someone knocked on the door. It was room service. She was thankful for the distraction. They ate in silence,  glancing at each other from time to time. It felt a little tense, they both had questions for the other. And she wasn't prepared to answer questions she thought he might have for her. So when she finished eating she  told him she needed to get going. "I'm way behind on this piece now. I should have had it mostly written up last night,  but I got a little held up. Not that I'm complaining but my editor will if she doesn't see what I've got so far. But I'm coming to the show tonight, that's the second part of the interview. Reviewing the show. Can I get a backstage pass you think?"

He hated that she was about to leave. He was afraid he'd never see her again. But then she says she's coming to the show tonight. "You're coming to the show tonight? That's awesome.  You've never seen me perform. And yes I'll put you on my all access list, so you can go wherever you want before the show". She loves his enthusiasm about her coming to his show. "I've seen you perform before, I came to a concert you did in San Francisco about 3 years ago. You were amazing" she said.  He asks her "Why didn't you try to come back and see me after the show? It would have been nice to see you back then". 
"I was still married then and my husband didn't know I was at the show, so I couldn't even stay for the whole thing.  I needed to get home before he realized I was gone...I mean before he realized I was seeing you. He knew about our past and would have been jealous that I wanted to see you. It was best to keep it my secret"

He didn't like the sound of her ex husband, there was something in her voice that made him think he wasn't such a great guy. And she also didn't sound like she wanted to discuss him. It worried him.

Vivian got dressed and was getting ready to leave when Jordan took her hand and pulled her to his chest. He kissed her hard on the mouth. He didn't want her to go. She kissed him back, slipping her tongue into his mouth and tasting him. She moaned against his mouth. His eyes were still closed when she pulled away from him. He was about to say something, when she interrupted him. "Can I see you again? Maybe tonight after the show"? He kissed her again and said, "I was about to ask you the exact same question. Yes I'd really like that. Hell I'd fucking love that. Just take a cab to the show tonight and you can ride back with me after. Would that be okay"?

She thought that would be better than okay, it would be exactly what she'd been waiting for, for the last nine years.