Only You

twenty-three

I looked at Mariam's figure while walking towards her.

"Mariam?" I called.

She looked up at me with her red eyes and nose plus tear-stained face.

I felt bad for snapping at her the way I did, but I didn't feel I was being unreasonable.

"I'm sorry for the way I spoke to you earlier," I said.

She sniffed, wiping her tears.

"The only reason I did so, was because I was scared." She let out in a small voice.

I furrowed my eyebrows taking a seat next to her.

"Scared of what?"

"Dr.Siddiqui, I need your help. Please." She said as she got down onto the floor holding my hands.

"What are you doing? Get up."

"I have something to tell you." She said.

I realized where this was going and I looked at her trying to mentally prepare myself.

"Dr. Khan is my husband." She said.

Is? IS?

"He was. Until you left him and your daughter Mariam Sheikh." I spat

"Huda, I know what I did. I know it was wrong and every part of me regrets it." She said as a set of tears made their way to her eyes.

"Your regret won't change anythin-"

"I know, please help me. I need my daughter back, I want my family back." She said crying.

"What?" I lightly scoffed.

Her family? I was getting uneasy listening to where this was going.

"I was scared, I was in trouble with loan sharks. I needed money, and I didn't have enough to pay them back, so they started threatening me. I was scared they'd hurt my family. That fear drove me to make the biggest mistake of my life. I left.. I left my life behind. My daughter, the love of my life. It wasn't easy for me. I didn't know where to go, and I was too ashamed to go back. I worked as a waitress, slept at my friend's apartment. I fell into depression, all day every day I thought of Humza. We were so hopelessly in love, I missed him. I wanted to see my daughter. I worked and worked tirelessly in the hopes of seeing them again. I was terrified, the sharks had already invaded my house once before my marriage, they threatened me in front of my little brother, I didn't know what to do. But, now it's too late. Humza hates me. He doesn't want to see me, he doesn't want me near my daughter. I found out he was going to marry you, and my heart shattered. I'll do anything for you Huda, please don't do this." She wailed.

A wave of shock went through me as I felt like I could practically hear my heartbreak. Tears pooled into my eyes as I contemplated where I stood. Dr. Khan and Haniah are Mariam's family, she's his first wife, and Haniah's biological mother. If I got married to Dr. Khan, I'd break a family. It wasn't Mariam's fault, she deserved a second chance. What's better than a biological mother for Haniah, and there's no way Dr. Khan would shut her out completely like this.

A tear came out of my eye as I blinked the rest away, looking back at Mariam I spoke with my raspy voice.

"Okay," I let out, quickly getting up and pacing to my car.

I locked my car door and put my hand to my mouth as the tears rushed out.

"This situation makes me so happy. I don't how to NOT smile!"

"Then perhaps I'll find out too why everyone likes Dr. Siddiqui."

"Try to pull through okay?"

I clenched my fists and cried like I had lost everything in my life, my shoulders shook while the rate of my tears was unstoppable. My throat was dry and my chest pained, I bit my lip and caressed my chest to attempt at calming down.

I thought to myself what I had to do. I had to back off. If Haniah got her mother back it would make her thrilled, and seeing her happy would do nothing but delight Dr. Khan. He definitely loved Mariam, there had to be a spot for her in his heart.

I had to do this. For Dr. Khan, for Haniah. I couldn't ruin a family when It had the perfect chance to be revived.

I cried until the back of my neck hurt from the tension and my eyes burned from the intensity of my breakdown. I took a deep breath and gripped my steering wheel.

Let's go home.

- - -- -- -

I woke up tired and already stressed. I had no motivation to dress up and go to work, so I put on my scrubs and a black hijab.

I was going to tell Ammi to call off the 'Wedding'. I knew no one was going to be happy, Abbu had been so proud, Ammi had been overjoyed, Bhai and Bhabi couldn't stop talking about it. But it had to be done, it was for the better.

I walked to the kitchen and saw my mom wiping the counters.

"Ma," I called.

"Hmm?"

"I want to cancel the Rishta," I said

Ammi froze and looked up at me in utter shock.

"What?"

"Call off the wedding plans," I said.

"Why! You have to give me a reason!" She said

"There isn't any. Dr. Khan isn't the one for me. Please just call it off." I said taking my breakfast bar and leaving.

I drove to the hospital and when I arrived at my office Mariam had been standing by my office.

"Huda-"

"There's nothing between me and Dr. Khan now. Please keep this matter outside of the hospital." I said opening my office and getting inside.

I wanted to cry, I felt the lump forming in my throat as my eyes begged my mind to let the tears out.

I shook my head, and thoughts off grabbing my folder. I had to go assign the interns their rooms, and then do my rounds.

I walked to the workroom 2B and saw the students waiting. I got to the point and gave them their appointments and right afterward went for my rounds.

My goal was to distract myself so I wouldn't overthink my decisions and become miserable. I was standing at the reception signing each paper quicker than the last. I had no surgeries today, which for the first time felt like the greatest bummer. All I could wish for right now was something time consuming to do so it could keep me away from being alone.

"Dr. Siddiqui." I heard Dr. Khan's voice.

I turned to my left to meet with his critical expression.

"I need to see you in my office now."