My Immortal (Abducted by Grammar Nazis)

Chapter 32

Chapter 32

AN: I sed stup fflaming I no his nam iznt tom bodil dat wuz a mistak!1111 if u dnot lik de story den u kan go skrew urself!11111 U SUK!111111

{Trans: I said stop flaming! I know his name isn’t Tom Bombodil (Still ?). That was a mistake! If you don’t like the story then you can go screw yourself! You suck! (Hey no swears this time :D achievement unlocked!}

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“Hi.” I said flirtily. “I’m Ebony Way, the new student.” I shook my pale hands with black nail polish with him.

“The name’s Tom.” he said. “But you can call me Satan {SUCH CREATIVITY!!!!!}. That’s my middle name.”

“Well come on we have to go upstairs.” Satan said. I followed him.

“Hey Satan do you happen to be a fan of Green Day?” (sinz mcr and evinezenz dont exist yet den) {Trans: Since MCR and Evanescence don’t exist yet then.}  I asked.

“Oh my f***ing god, how did you know?” Satan gasped. “Actually I like Good Charlotte a lot too.”(geddit coz gc did that song I just wanna live that’s ounded really 80s) {Trans: Get it? Because Good Charlotte did that song ‘I just wanna live’ that sounded really 80s (Her concept of time is really off in this chapter. Be prepared for that.)}

“Oh my god, me too!” I replied happily.

“Guess what, they have a concert in Hogsment.” Satan whispered.

“Hogsment?” I asked.

“Yeah that’s what they used to call it in this time before it became Hogsmeade in 2000.” he told me all secretively {See? How would he know what something is called in 2000, in the future?}. “And there’s a really cool shop called Hot-“

‘Topic!” I finished, happy again.

He frowned confused. “No it’s called Hot Issue.” He smiled secretively again. “Then in 1998 they changed it to Hot Topic.” he moaned. {Yet again, how would he know what’s in the future?}

“Ohh.” Now everything was making sense for me. “So is Dumbledore your principal?” I shouted.

“Uh-huh.” He looked at his black nails. “I’m in Slytherin’”

“Oh my f***ing god! Me too!” I shrieked.

“You go to this school?” he asked.

“Yeah, that’s why I’m here. I’m new.” I smiled happily.

Suddenly Dumbledore flew in on his broomstick and started shouting at us angrily. “No talking in the halls!” He had short blonde hair and was wearing a polo shirt from American Eagle Outfits. {Did I do that right?} “Stupid goths!”

Satan rolled his eyes. “His so mean to us goths and punks just because we’re in Slytherin and we’re not preps.”

I turned around angrily. “Actually I think maybe it’s because you’re the Dark Lord.”

“What the f***?” he asked angrily.

“Oh nothing.” I said sweetly.

Then suddenly the floor opened. “Oh my f***ing god! No!” I screamed as I fell down. Everyone looked at me weirdly.

“Hey where are you going?” Satan asked as I fell.

I got out of the hole and it was back in the Pensive in Professor Trelawney’s classroom. Dumbledore was there. “Dumbledore I think I just met you.” I said.

“Oh yeah, I remember that.” Dumbledore said, trying to be gothic.

Professor Sinister came in. “Hey this is my classroom! Wait, what the f*** Ebony, what the hell are you doing?”

“Um.” I looked at her.

“Oh yeah, I forgot about that.”

“What the hell, how?” I screamed, forgetting she was a teacher for a second. But she’s a goth so it’s okay.

Professor Sinister looked sad. “Um, I was drinking Voldemortserum.” She started to cry black tears of depression. Dumbledore didn’t know about them.

“Hey are you crying tears of blood?” he asked curiously, touching a tear.

“F*** off!” we both said and Dumbledore took his hand away.

Professor Sinister started crying again in her chair, sobbing limpid tears. “Oh my f***ing god. Ebony I think I’m addicted to Voldemortserum.”

AN: SEE U FOKKING PREPZ GO FOK URSELXXZ DATZ SERUS ISSUZ 2O GO 2 HELL!1111112 {Trans: See you f***ing preps! Go f*** yourselves! That’s serious issues! So go to hell!}