My Immortal (Abducted by Grammar Nazis)

Chapter 42- The Black Parade

Chapter 42- The Black Parade

AN: omg da new book iz kumming out rlly soon I kant wait!!!1111. I fink dat snap will be really the same person as Volximort koz dey are both haff-blood so dat will explain y he kild dumblydore and he hated hairy!!!!!1111 nd den hairy wil have 2 kommit suicide so voldimort will die koz he will rilly be a horcrox!!!!!111 omg I hope draco nd harry get 2getha dat will be so shmexxy, wont it?? If dey don’t den JKR is hamophobic!!!!!111111 fangz 4 da help wiv facts, medusa u rok!!!111

{Trans: (Oh good god XnO} Oh my god the new book is coming out really soon! I can’t wait! I think that Snape with really the same person as Voldemort because they are both half-blood so that will explain why he killed Dumbledore and he hated Harry! (Watch the very last movie you b*tch) And the Harry will have to commit suicide so Voldemort will die because he will really by a Horocrux! Oh my god I hope Draco and Harry get together. That will be so sexy won’t it?! If they don’t then J.K. Rowling is homophobic! (Only in your dreams hun.) Thanks for the help with facts Medusa! You rock!}

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I sat depressed in Dumbledore’s office with Hedwig, Satan, James, Sirius, Snape, and Lucius. Dumbledore was sitting in front of us cruelly. He looked younger than he did in the future. He had taken the iPod away and was now listening to a sh*tty Avril Levine song.

“What the hell is this anyway?” he cackled meanly. I hoped he didn’t find out that I was from another time.

“Whatever you do, don’t blame Ebony, you jerk.” Satan said.

“Yeah, seriously, she was trying to get Satan and Hedwig back together.” Sirius said defiantly.

“Be quiet you Satanists.” Dumbledore cackled. “If you’re lucky I’ll probably send you all to Azkaban! That will teach you to copulate in the Great Hall.” He changed the song on da iPod to an In ’Sync song. Suddenly I noticed something strange about the iPod. It was slowly changing! Dumbledore didn’t notice.

“You f***ing poser.” I muttered.

“I bet you’ve never heard of Good Charlotte.” James said. Know I knew what the iPod was changing into- Marty McFly’s time machine!

“Shut up James!” Lucius shouted.

“Yeah shut up!” Snape said preppily.

“No you shut up Dumbledore!” said Tom.

“I’ve had enough of you Satanists in my school!” shouted Dumbledore spuriously.

Suddenly I grabbed the iPod from him. “Everyone! Jump in before it’s too late!” I jumped into it. But only one other person jumped in. It was Satan.

“You dunderheads!” screamed Dumbledore wisely as we went.

I looked around. I was in the Slytherin common room with Satan. I was wearing a black plaid miniskirt with hot pink fishnets, a sexy, black MCR corset, and black stilton boots with pink pentagrams on them. My earrings were black Satanist signs and my raven hair was all around me to my mid-back.

“Hey cool. Where is this?” he asked in an emo voice.