Complicated (First Book)

2 are

Its 4:20

Well.. not for you...

Don't wake me up if I'm sleeping this life away.. "kellin? wake up," vic says and I turn so I'm laying on my stomach with my face in the blankets. They smell like honey and herbs; like vic.

I hate who I am today..

Can I just sleep forever?

"We have school, get up," he says trying to get me up.

"Go away and I will," I mumble and he gets up.

"Fine, I'll make breakfast," he says leaving. When he leaves the room I grab my binder from the floor and start putting it on. The fact that I have small boobs should make me happy but it doesn't. I hate that I have any.

I want to be like vic, he has a nice body. But no, I'm me. When I see myself in Vic's mirror I want to cry. Wide hips, skinny waist, no dick.. what kind of guy am I?

A girl..

I'm a girl...

That's what kind of guy I am.

I shove my- no, let me be accurate. I shove vic's clothes on. I then go back to the bed and curl up on it. I want more sleep and I definitely don't want to go to school.

After 10 or so minutes vic comes on after a knock and looks at me with sympathy.. He knows how much I hate school. He gives me a plate of food and I take it slowly. Everything about my body makes me upset and uncomfortable. I'm too fat but I'm also too skinny.

I slowly eat as vic gets dressed in his bathroom. Thunder storms are going to fill this week and I hate that. I'm scared of thunder and stormy weather. After I'm done eating I put my shoes on and Vic comes out.

"Can I go home? It's going to be stormy.." I mumble looking down and biting my tongue.

"No, let's go," he says and starts dragging me to hell. I don't want him to hold my hand, or drag me to school. I yank my hand away from him and shove them in my pockets. I'm not a girl, I don't want to hold a guy's hand.

I still follow him and Mike gets off the couch and we all go to Vic's car. Outside its gray, cold, and looks like it's going to start storming. Anxious thoughts about the weather run through my brain as we head to school.

-

The school is almost completely sound proof so when I'm about to walk out the school I internally freak out because of the rain I see through the door windows. Vic leaves school after 3rd block because he's a smart senior who already has all his credits.

I usually walk home, I live really close to the school. Vic should know I'm terrified of this weather and pick me up.. but he hasn't answered my texts. I'm on the verge of tears. Today has just been really bad. Not really physically but in my mind it's been a tough day.

I'm wearing vic's tie dye hoodie so it seems like I'd be viable enough not to run into. My thoughts were proven wrong when someone runs into me and we both fall to the ground.

"Fuck, that hurt asshole," I say opening my eyes to see a guy looking at me surprised. He's on top of me but not touching me.

Words can't expess his beauty but I want him off and away from me. "Sorry, I was-" he starts in a thick British accent. I think I have him in my second class.

"There he is! Let's kill hi-" three guys start as they run through the hall. The guy whose on me glares at them.

"Stop it you fucking cunts, you made me hurt this guy," he says and they all stop and look at me.

"Oi, sorry mate," one says to me.

"Can you get off?" I whisper to him and he looks at me in realization.

He gets up and sticks out his hand for me to take. I shake my head and get up on my own. "Bye Oli. we'll kill you tomorrow or something," one of the guys says.

"Okay, bye," The tall British guy says. As he watches them leave I look at him a bit closer. He's full of tattoos and looks flawless.

See theres hot guys like him, and then hot guys like Andy Sixx. I prefer this look. It's as if he doesn't give a fuck, he's just naturally hot. Guys like Andy you can tell they are trying to be a chick magnet.

Andy just seems so hot it's fake? But Oli is hotter than Andy but he doesn't seem fake. "Where's your ride?" He asks making me blush. I almost forgot he was here.

"I'm walking," I say now looking at the stormy weather.

"I would offer you a ride but I'm walking home too. How about I walk you home?" He says and I actually appreciate this offer. I'd definitely have a panic attack if I had to walk alone.

"Sure? Why?" I say looking at him confused. We aren't friends, why is he offering to walk me home?

He puts his hands in his pockets and looks at me. He has a blank expression on and I feel a little vulnerable because I cant read him. "I just feel like it. I like the rain," he says and shoves the door open with his foot and we walk out.

I hope it's not thundering.. I don't want to embarrass myself in front of this guy. I'm aware I shouldn't get a crush because I'm not going to date anyone..

But I think I already like this guy...