Complicated (First Book)

21

When I run past Vic and Mum Vic tries to start talking to me but his mom stops him. I rush up to Mike's room and burst into it crying.

I'm so caught up I'm drama I almost didn't realize he was kissing Tony until they separate. "O-oli started q-questioning me because I wasn't bulging and- and I feel so stupid- he said, that, he said that he only likes guy!" I cry and ramble not breathing.

Mike jumps up and starts hugging me and rubbing my back a little. "He found out?" He asks me.

"N-no but- he- I'm such a fuck up," I cry and accidentally make eye contact with Tony. He doesn't know.. shit did I blow my cover?

"Tony can you leave?" Mike says and Tony looks confused.

"What? No, he-" Tony starts.

"Tony, he has secrets that he needs to talk about. Just because he trusts me doesn't mean he trusts you," Mike says and I feel bad.

"H-he can stay I-in you trust him," I whisper.

Tony looks hurt by Mike's harshness but I do appreciate it greatly. "Okay, he said you can stay," Mike says and pulls away a little.

"Tell me why you're upset calmly this time," he says and I wipe my face a bunch and tell him about what Oli last said.

"He's my best friend, I've seen him date girls and guys. I think he was just saying that because he thinks that's what you want to here," Mike says.

"I'm confused.." Tony says and I look at him.

"I'm trans.." I mumble and a lightbulb turns on over his head. Or I imagine that happening. That's what his face did.

"Ohhhh, okay. So you're scared he wont like you because of your body," he says out loud.

"Oli is a good guy, he might be surprised but not upset. He likes you- believe me I've seen it- so you dont have to worry," Mike says and I smile a little. I'm not going to tell Oli but it gives me a little reassurance that he likes me.

"I wish I could hug him comfortably more," I pout.

"Why can't you?" Mike asks.

"My chest.." I say and he looks at my chest.

"But I didn't feel anything? Um, excuse my stupidity but how come I felt your chest last hug but not this hug?" He says and I don't feel weird about the question.

"I wasn't wearing a binder last time," I say and he nods but its clear he doesn't understand something.

He doesn't know what a binder is. "I'm flat chested because I literally tape my boobs down," I mumble and he nods.

"Does that hurt?" He asks and I shrug. It does because I use ducktape.

"Well a little while ago I bruise my ribs because I slept in it.. so yeah, but it's fine," I say brushing it off.

"Bro, that's not good," Mike says and I roll my eyes.

"You don't understand," I mumble and Mike glances at Tony.

"Let us understand, aren't there other ways to bind?" Tony says and I run my fingers through my hair. Being open is weird.

"There are but my parents won't buy me them and nobody knows.. so I can't ask," I mumble.

"I'll buy you stuff if it's safe," he says and my face turns from shy and nervous to excited and happy.

"You will!? I'll give you money!" I say grabbing my wallet and shoving twenty dollars at him. He chuckles a little.

- uhhh time skip a week or so-
(I'm pretty sure Oli and kellin have been taking for 4 ish weeks?)

Oliver's pov

Me and kellin are at a icecream shop. Today he was super happy and seems way more comfortable than I've ever seen him.

When I noticed how happy he was I decided to take him out to celebrate. It is and isn't a date.

Me and kellin are friends but we do occasionally kiss and I may or may not flirt with him a lot. He still wont let me touch him but I'm fine with that. I respect that he doesn't want to do anything sexual.

"So why are you so happy mister 'I feel like im flying'," I quote him from earlier when he first saw me and started jumping up and down and hugging me.

"Well that's a secret! Buttttttt, just be happy because I'm so happy," he says bouncing a little as he talks. I love seeing him so happy.

Mike walks into the icecream store with his secret boyfriend and kellin jumps out of his seat and throws his arms around Mike. Mike laughs surprised but hugs back briefly before hugging Tony. "Thank you so much!" He praises Mike and then before Mike can say anything Kellin is back with me.

"Mike is so amazing he- Oh, well um.. he's just cool. You're awesome," he says going shy. I chuckle at how adorable he's being.

The lady who works here gives us our orders and kellin is all smiles. He's more talkative and is more energetic. After a while of eating and talking and him giggling at everything he blushes and looks at me differently.

"C-can we go.. and um.. make out?" He asks blushing. That caught me off guard. I smile and get up.

"I'd like that very much," I say and he grabs my hand and drags me out of the icecream shop. He takes me to the driver seat of my car and opens the door for me.

I get in and he surprises me more by getting in with me and straddles me. His lips are on mine and I grab his side and he doesn't flinch like he usually does.

I like happy kellin..

Do you know why kellins happy?

How long will this happiness last?