Rabbit Heart - Merlin Fanfiction

The Secret Sharer

We stood there in silence, letting the words sink in. I stand there, staring at him. A part of me wanted to leave, maybe to come back and try it all again. From another angle, another time, another place. But I had nothing else to go on, and he seemed genuine enough. And if there was something that I was sure of, was that he knew something. A something that meant the world to me. All I want to do is to understand.

"Is there somewhere we can go?" He asks, collecting his things. I snap about of my daze and nod. The early morning sun was still making it's way through the sky. I bring him back to the hovel, I don't know what possessed me to do it, but I could see he'd prefer to tell this tale whilst sitting down. I put a cushion on the bench beneath the window and bring him a drink. I sit next him, a bag of mixed emotions. Both eager and nervous to hear what he has to say.

"Thank you" he gestures to drink he placed on the table, "I was gasping, herb collecting is becoming a bit of a task nowadays" he chuckles to himself. I nod sympathetically.
"I'm sorry I hit you with the stick" I say quietly, looking down.
"This might sound quite strange my dear, but I'll tell you a secret," he pauses and I look up searching his icy blue eyes for answers, "I'm glad you did!"
I pull a face, and he smiles, "I don't understand"
"If it didn't happen, I wouldn't have met you. At least once I've told my side to your story I can die happy"
"As long as that's no time soon!" I add, there was something about our chance meeting that was written in the stars. Just as much as there was something about him that drew me closer to him. I was beginning to feel as if I'd known him forever.

"What in about to tell you, maybe a little hard for you to hear. You have probably been wondering these questions for a long time now"
"Gaius, I'm ready"

"My dear your father, despite all his flaws, was a good man and a good friend of mine. I was sorry to see him pass"
"He's dead?" I whisper, half expecting something like that to be the case.
"I'm afraid so my dear, I had tried to find you before. I'm still not sure to this day how much he knew about you, but I would have liked to have brought you two together, I'm sorry I'm to late"
"It's ok Gaius, it's not your fault. I had half expected something like this to be the case if I ever were to find out. Who was he Gaius?"
Gaius sighed and I threw him a concerned glance.
"Your father was Uther Pendragon"

My eyes widen and he can tell that I was already beginning to connect the dots. My bond with both Arthur and Morgana was always deeper than any friendship but I had no idea how deep.
"Does that mean?" I begin
"Yes my dear, you are related to King Arthur and Morgana"

There is a brief moment of silence,
"I hope one day you can meet them, even Morgana despite the damage she has caused, it's be wrong of me to wish anything different for you"
He takes my arms, and his hands run down them to mine. He looks down to see Morgana's healing bracelet, the one morgause had given to her.
"You already have" he said quietly.
"I live with her, but I had no idea, she has no idea"
"I'm glad you've met her, at least I know you aren't alone"

There's another pause.
"Gaius, how do you know this? Why couldn't I stay in Camelot?"
"I think you partly know the answer to this," he raises an eyebrow, "I had to smuggle you out of the castle when you were born, I had to do the same for morgause too. I could tell that you had magic, the moment you were born. I gave you to the Druids, so you could learn about your magic."
"They taught me well"
"Uther couldn't of kept you because, well I'm guessing you can guess that much"
"I understand."

"Is this where Morgana lives?"Gaius questions. I nod,
"Please don't say anything, she's not here at the moment...I won't let her harm you. I'm trying to convince her that another war won't lift the ban on magic! Please Gaius, don't let anyone know"
"Don't worry child, no harm will come to you from Camelot, you are a lady now after all"
I blush ,"a lady!" I laugh "I've never imagined myself as a lady! Does Arthur know about this?" I ask.
Gaius shakes his head, he has no knowledge of this, I'm not sure how to tell him!"
"It's ok Gaius, id like to do it together if that's ok"
"Very well my lady" he gets up and bows jokingly "as you wish, now if you don't mind I better get back to Camelot before Morgana returns and merlin starts to worry!"

I follow him to the door, let me walk you to the edge of the forest at least?" I ask.
"It'd be my pleasure"
"Thank you Gaius" I give him a hug, "thank you for everything"

And with that we left the hovel together, chatting mindlessly about the things we had seen and done. I was a little sorry to see him return to the castle, but I promised him I'd visit him soon.