An Ultima's Redemption (Garroth X Reader) (Book Two)

Freshman Year (End)

These next few chapters will be shorter than usual, and will also be written like a diary entry. This style of writing will make more sense later on. Maybe not in this book, but also maybe in this book. You'll never know, hehe.

Y/n's P.O.V

It's been one full year of pain, grief, and depression. I was told college would be my escape from my past. They said that I would finally be free. After 4 years of sexual and physical abuse, I was ready for my escape, ready to see my friends and Aaron. Even if I didn't admit it or realize it myself at first..... I was broken, obedient, and acted out of fear. I feared that if I broke my walls down and learned to be happy again, that it would only cause me more pain. To be fair, I was right; I stopped being the submissive female I was taught to be, re-instituted my relationship with Garroth, and stopped fearing men. But as a result of that, I was almost taken advantage of, then actually taken advantage of, then kidnapped and taken advantage of again. Not to mention I now bare the mates mark of a kidnapper/rapist. I have so much self doubt within myself that I can't even look at myself without being ashamed. I wasn't strong enough to protect myself in high school, and now in college I still can't protect myself. I rely on everyone around me to do that, I have body guards for crying out loud. Like, what? So many bad things happened to me this year. Even though I am surrounded by people, I've never felt more alone. But maybe this is just me overreacting. I have a loving boyfriend. I have so many friends who would give anything to protect me. I have Aaron, my best friend, my brother. I am going to college free of debt because my father wants to fix things between us. I got Laxy, my wolf, back this year. The rumors about me have stopped. I was saved from all the evil people in my life. I finally put Gene away in jail where he belongs. With all this good in my life, I should be happy.

So can someone, anyone, please tell me why I am still depressed.....

But that isn't ever going to happen. Because I keep my emotions bottled up inside and I don't tell anyone anything. Not Garroth or Aaron or Aphie or Lucy or Tara, literally not a single person. This constant feeling of sadness has been looming over my head for years and now I think it is at it's peak. The only time I ever experience pure and genuine happiness is when I am with my Garroth, my mate. He makes me feel so loved and I just.... I don't think I would even still be alive if he left me in high school.

I think that is enough for this diary entry.
~Y/n

Like I said before, REALLY short chapters, but they will make sense, I promise. Sorry, I lost track of time and I guess it is technically Thursday now, not Wednesday anymore lol. Thank you so much for all the support I have been receiving recently. It makes me feel so happy to know people out there really enjoy my work. I know I am not the best writer, and I never claimed to be, but I love it and I am glad others do as well. I found this platform 4 years ago and completely submerged myself into the Aphmau Boys X Reader types of stories. Never did I think I would actually commit to writing a book of my own, let alone two! I used to just enjoy reading and I'm pretty sure I have read almost every Aphmau based book on this application (That's a joke lol). Now, it's kind of my escape from life. There is just something about diving so deep into a story, deep enough to forget your own life, that is so appealing to me. So I thank you all again so much for the love and support... <3
~Listen Taylor💙
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