She's Into Her

36 - Clean Break

 36 - Clean Break

A/N: Lord, gabayan niyo po sila. Amen.

Kaetherine's POV:

It must be an initial reaction to beam in such inexplicable happiness after learning that the person you most adore has reciprocated your deepest heart's wishes. To have tears in your eyes that express rather the joy you are feeling. Smile as if you are the happiest and as if it were your last. To feel like floating in the sky clouds, and no words can ever intricate the emotions you are feeling.

They say it was the best feeling ever—to finally be loved by someone you love, to finally have that long-awaited pleasure of patiently waiting and being free from all the yearnings—a longing no more, to finally be with the person you all wanted.

They even say lucky for those people who had been reciprocated... lucky for those who had been loved back... lucky for those who can love the person they love... but to what extent are they lucky if that love also has so many losses?

Ms. Rielle's sudden confession unleashed a flood of emotions within me—surprise, flattery, joy, curiosity, and excitement all at once.

I stood frozen in my spot as if my feet were glued in place, unsure how to react. I blinked twice, trying to process everything again. But when I met her blue eyes once more, everything began sinking in.

This wasn't really a dream; it was really happening! I cannot believe this is happening! How could this be happening? How could someone like me make Rielleiza Griyego fall in love?

"So, w-where should I start?" I heard her ask, snapping me back to reality. Napatingin naman ako kaagad dito and soon our eyes locked, and the world seemed to fade away, leaving only the vivid blue of her eyes drawing me in like a magnetic pull.

They were undeniably filled with gentleness, hope, and anticipation tonight. I also noticed how they glistened and shone fascinatingly—like the usual, one of those beautiful things about her. Yet, regardless of their familiarity, they are oddly different this time.

I tried to think about what it was, staring at it more intensely as they bore oddly different to me. It was something that I know I have seen already but staring at it feels so distinct. It was something that I strangely recall constantly seeing in the mirror and it took me no time to find out the answer as realization dawned on me.

It was how her blue eyes mirrored my brown ones—full of the same longing and hope, reflecting the way I had always looked at her. They are different now because of those distinct aspects. They are different now because they are already similar to mine. They are different now because looking into her eyes feels like looking into my own, full of love.

... and it just confirmed what I had feared.

Right then and there, my thoughts quickly spiraled from best to worst. Memories from yesterday rushed in, swift as an arrow: the shine in my eyes immediately tarnished and like a candle, too, lost its reaching burning flame.

An aching sensation began to fill my chest, eventually, fear triumphed in, and just as that instant, the emotions I felt flipped to their opposite, prickling my chest as I stood there, slapping me with my reality.

"Llianna?" muling pagtawag nito sa akin. My eyes heated when I reverted my gaze to her. Malungkot ko itong tinignan at unti-unting umiling dito.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Rielle, I... I cannot do this. We cannot make the situation more complicated," I politely said and plastered my most apologetic smile—extinguishing her hopes, perhaps all our hopes at that instant.

Not knowing who am I truly sorry for, was it for her or me? Because I knew that as soon as I spoke, my words would change everything.

Thereafter, before I could even see how her eyes would die with my words being the culprit, I managed to quickly turn away, leaving her again behind.