When the Pen Bleeds

XI. YOUR THOUGHTS

I shook my head and flashed a slight smile when I saw this girl whom I love for a long time. Her long hair that black as a charcoal, her hazel brown eyes, her pinkish lips and rosy cheeks were not the reasons why I fell in love with her. It's her pure thoughts that caught me off guard and made my heart pounds whenever I see her.

With my confidence that I have, I automatically moved my feet going to her place and sat beside the brown bench.

I saw how her cheeks blushed when her shoulder touched mine.

I took a deep breath and gathered all the courage that I have inside me before talking to her.

" I love you Gezreel and I know you feel the same. So please allow me to court you."

Literal na namilog ang kanyang mga mata dahil sa pagbasag ko ng katahimikan sa pagitan namin. Yes I know that she's also inlove with me since we were in high school.

" H-how did you know?" She asked with her lips trembling.

I shrugged my shoulders and chuckled. "I just know."

Muli kong ibinaling ang tingin sa kanya na ngayo'y mukhang aligaga dahil sa nalaman ko.

She was just about to speak but I already cut her off.

" I know your answer is yes. Don't worry I'll court you until you became mine."

" H-how?" Nagtatakang tanong niya pa rin habang ang tinuturo ako gamit ang hintuturo nya.

I smiled. "I can read minds Gezreel."
---
" Micael, can't you really teach me how to read minds?" She suddenly asked with a begging tone.

"I can't teach you love." I replied and sipped the coffee that I ordered.

Napangiti ako nang maalala ko kung paano naging kami after I courted her for four months. It really make my heart flutters when I always feel that we are so in love with each other.

" Ang daya mo naman e. Ikaw lang nakakabasa ng nasa isip ko"

I tried to force a smile because of what she said.

" You're lucky that you can't read minds Gezreel. Just be happy with what you have right now." I uttered and patted her head for her to ease the jealousy that she's having.

She sliced a small piece of the chocolate moist cake before putting it into her mouth.

" Hanggang saan ang kaya mong malaman sa isip ko?"

I placed my right hand below my chin and fixed my serious gaze at her as if I'm thinking so hard.

" I know that you want to kiss me right now " sagot ko at mabilis na nilapit ang mukha ko sa mukha nya at binigyan siya ng isang mabilis na halik.

" H-hey!" mahinang sambit niya habang nakahawak sa pisngi nyang pulang-pulang na.

I tapped her shoulders which made her head be lifted.

" You asked. I just answered." sagot ko sa kanya ng may mapang-asar na tono.

I also know that she still wants another but I just ignored it 'cause she would probably get mad at me.

Such a silly young lady.
---
Tatlong taon na ang nakalipas magmula ng maging kami ni Gezreel.

Sa mga taong yon, I can say that I'm the luckiest man alive because I have a girl who also love me so much.

Not until one day when she went home from her work, it seems like everything changed.

I was just about to speak but she made a 'stop' gesture using one of her hands.

" Please Micael. I'm tired. Stop reading my mind."

I bit my lower lip and heaved a sigh.

" Let's talk." I seriously said.

She removed her blazer and stand in front of me.

" We're already talking."

" I know. But let's fix this. I want to save our relationship Gezreel."

" I said stop reading my mind."

" Then please tell it to me."

Napayuko siya sa sinabi ko. I hate this feeling. I don't want her to leave me.

" I'm already tired with this relationship."

My heart ached because of her answer. Of course I already knew it. These past few weeks, sa tuwing uuwi sya hindi na sya yung Gezreel na nakilala ko. Hindi na sya yung Gezreel na lagi akong kinukulit na magpaturo kung paano magbasa ng isip. Our sparks slowly faded.

" I know." tipid kong sagot dahilan para gumuhit sa kanyang mukha ang inis.

" Then why do you want me to tell it to you? Alam mo naman na pala eh. So it means alam mo na r----"

" Stop." I uttered. My eyes started to get wet and that's when I noticed that my tears are already falling. I shouldn't be like this. Hindi naman to gawain ng lalaki. Hindi ko gawaing umiyak but this woman that I love made me cry because of the grief that I'm having.

" Sapat ng malaman ko sa isip mo na hindi mo ako mahal Gezreel. Alam ko naman na kahit hindi mo sabihin 'cause I can read minds. And I hate it." sambit ko habang patuloy pa rin ang pagtulo ng mga luha ko.

Naaawa siya sa akin ngayon pero wala akong pake. Naaawa siya pero hindi nagbago yung nasa isip niya na hindi niya na ako mahal.

" Sorry." sagot niya at saka nagsimulang humikbi habang nakayuko sa harap ko.

I hugged her for the last time.

" You don't need to say sorry Gezreel. Okay na sa akin na nalaman ko sa isip mo na hindi na gaya ng dati ang nararamdaman mo. Just don't say it personally 'cause that would hurt me more."

She slowly escaped from my arms and quickly wiped her tears.

" Gusto mong pakawalan na kita. So I am letting you go Gezreel. Muli nalang akong mananatiling nakatingin sayo sa malayo habang binabasa ang isipan mong baka nagbago. At kapag nangyari yon, at kapag nabasa ko ulit sa isipan mong mahal mo na ulit ako. Hindi ako magdadalawang isip na lapitan ka. And I will make you mine again. 'Cause I still love you... and I always will."
---

WORK OF FICTION
(sorry for grammatical errors)