Contestshipping One-Shots

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Warning! Angst ahead

Drew had screwed himself over. It was no surprise that the way he treated her was not something she looked for. For some reason he had always picked on her and been a little mean to her, most likely because he had such strong feelings and didn't know how to contain and control them. But it didn't matter in the long run. Just when he thought he had finally been able to relax around her, just when he got the feeling he could actually have a chance of starting a relationship with her, someone else came out of nowhere and stole her heart.

It was Brendan Birch. But no matter how much he wanted to, he couldn't hate the guy. He was really nice and seemed to take good care of her. She was happy, so he wouldn't let himself ruin everything for her by getting his feelings involved. So after 6 months of texting each other every day, he backed off. No texts from her to keep the friendship alive during that time. He thought it was for the better though, as much as he longed for conversation with her, he couldn't trust himself to not do anything stupid and make her unhappy.

And then, they broke up. He wanted to be there for her, a shoulder to cry on, but they hadn't talked in three months, and he didn't want to overstep any boundaries, so he just sucked it up. But then a few months later, she texted him. Things finally seemed to be looking up, they were talking a bunch again, and things were feeling really natural, but when he least expected it, she got back together with Brendan.

He had to shove his feelings down again, but he started to go numb. Numb from that feeling of hurt that he had experienced again. He felt used. He felt played. He felt like such an idiot. But even still, he couldn't hate her. She didn't do anything wrong. She didn't know she was hurting him. She was an amazing person, and he had no right to feel any disdain or resentment towards her. She was just following her heart. He couldn't hate Brendan either, he was a good guy, even if he did break her heart before. He just wanted her to be happy because she was special to him.

Then she ghosted him, leaving behind a shell of his soul.

But no matter how much the emotions swelled up, even if he was on the brink of it, the tears wouldn't fall. He started to give up. Maybe he wasn't cut out for love. It always fell apart on him, leaving him with the painful feelings left behind, knowing he could never be upset with those that had hurt him. He could feel the negative emotions towards those who had hurt him build up, but they would quickly deflate as the shame and guilt came in.

There must be something wrong with him, something that's just unloveable. It was growing more difficult for him to see her without feeling the pain that was then dulled by the seeping numbness in his body. It was embarrassing to be bent out of shape by a girl, to let his feelings get the better of him. He invests too much into doomed relationships. He invested his whole heart, but all the profit that came in return was just its shattered remains. Would he ever get it right? Would things ever go his way? He was exhausted. How long would it take to heal again? Would he even heal? But there are some scars that never heal.

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-A/N-

This wasn't the original direction of the one shot, it was supposed to be happy but, I guess I just needed to rant in the form of a story. I know everyone is out of character, ESPECIALLY Drew, but it was originally supposed to be happier so that will be the next one shot. Anyways, I'm just tired of feeling played. This time I can't even cry anymore. I've liked this guy for a year. We're really similar and get along really well and he's a super sweet guy and like one of the most quality guys you could ever meet, so I had it really bad. We texted everyday for about 6 months, near the end though, his responses were less frequent. I found out in November he started to date this girl.

It came out of nowhere, almost nobody knew about it until an Instagram post which my friend showed me because I'm not allowed to have social media (yeah Wattpad is a secret!) of them together. He hadn't responded to my last message so I waited for him to respond for another month, before texting him in December, but that lasted like a day. I had to try and let it go.

Then they broke up late January early February. But still, I didn't try to reach out or anything, I had done it the last time and he didn't seem interested so I didn't want to push anything, we still talked in person, just not personal stuff or anything, just chit chat. And then quarantine happened, and the first day he texted me, and we started talking again, and it really seemed like it was going somewhere.

And then I got ghosted for 2 weeks. Until I got a text 2 weeks ago from him apologizing for it because he has a hanky phone that messes stuff up and he has to respond to some other people as well. I said that it was okay but he said that it wasn't because he had been silent for 2 weeks. So at this point I was getting hopeful again based on his response, and we talked again texting on and off, and then him, another friend, and I all called and talked on Thursday, and after that I didn't get a text from him.

And then 2 days ago my friend texted me saying that the guy I liked and his ex were back together. So I feel really used and played, but at the same time, I can't hate him because he's pretty oblivious, and he's just a really nice guy. I feel borderline numb, I can't cry no matter how close I feel to it and how overwhelmed. I'm just tired of all of this because everytime I like someone, they start dating someone else, all the while it seems like things are going fine for us.

I've just got to accept that I'm going to forever be single because I've never dated anybody and at the rate I'm going it sure doesn't seem like I'll find anybody soon. Anyways, this is all super fresh, but I don't really want to bother any of my friends about it because while it hurts, it's more dull than the first time. I think I'm just getting used to it I guess. Anyways, if you read this, thanks, I needed to rant.

Until next time,

YouDontKnowShipping