Linda stood by the window, watching for her husband's car. "Where is he?" She mumbled, rocking nervously on her toes.
"Relax, Mom," Jack said, walking through the living room. "He's probably stuck in traffic."
"Yeah," she nodded as she rubbed her arms, "traffic."
He cocked his head, "Mom, are you okay?"
"I- I'm fine, sweetie. I'm just worried about your Dad."
"Dad's fine!" The teenager bounded up the stairs.
The blonde chewed her lip as she counted the minutes until she saw a car pull up in the driveway.
A car door slammed, and Danny walked to the front door. He opened it, "hey, I'm—"
Linda launched herself at him, clinging to his shoulders. She kissed his neck, breathing in his cologne and stale coffee.
"—home."
"You came home!"
".... don't I usually?"
As if realizing a mistake, Linda backed away. She pushed her hair back and cleared her throat. "I just..." Getting defensive, she stiffened. "Is it such a crime to be happy that you're home?"
"What's with the tone?"
"There is no tone!" She crossed her arms, setting her jaw.
"There is a tone, Linda, and you know it."
"Oh. So I can't be pissed? I have to be happy all the time? Sunshine and lollipops, is that it?"
Danny sighed, getting angry and annoyed. "I never said that-"
"But you thought it."
"What is your problem?"
"Problem? Problem?! Because I'm mad, I have a problem?!" She grunted and breezed passed him to the stairs. "Your dinner's in the microwave. Of course, You won't like it."
Danny nearly growled as he watched Linda storm up the stairs. He wondered what had gotten into her lately. First, every morning, she begged him to stay home. Then, she'd call him too many times during his tour. When he came home, she'd act happy to see him. He'd make snarky remark at some point in the evening, and she'd go off the rails. Then he'd find her crying in the bathroom, and once he comforted her, all would be well again. In the morning, it would happen all over again.
Danny shook his head as he grabbed a beer. He took a long sip, contemplating his wife's behavior. Suddenly, it hit him like a ton of bricks. "Of course!" He put the beer down and walked to his bedroom, stopping to say hello to his sons. When he saw the bedroom vacant, but the bathroom door closed, he sat on the bed, waiting for Linda to come out.
Linda walked out, seemingly annoyed. When she saw Danny, she huffed, "What do you want?"
"I think it's time you and I have one of our world famous talks."
Linda sat on the bed, not looking at him. "What kind of talk?"
"Linda... I wanna ask you something... how come you didn't want me to go to work today?" He knew the answer; he just needed his wife to say it.
"I wanna be with you," Linda shrugged, finally looking at him.
"I wanna be with you, too, sweetie. But, lately... you've been clingy. Don't get me wrong— I like your hugs and kisses; they're very nice and always make my day better.... but if something's bothering you, I need to know." He rubbed her back, right above her wound.
She winced slightly, "I'm fine."
"Are you upset about something?"
"I said I'm fine." She repeated, quite annoyed, walking to the wardrobe.
"Well, then, I guess you won't be begging me to stay home anymore."
Linda stopped what she was doing. She looked down, "are you mad at me?"
"No, honey, I'm not mad at you. I just need to know what's bothering you."
"Nothing's bothering me."
"Lin-"
"I promise." She turned around and managed a smile, "I'm fine."
"If you're fine, why are you playing with your pendant?"
She stalled her movements; whenever she played with the small charms on her necklace, something was bothering her. "Just fidgety."
Danny stood and walked to her. He put his hands on her shoulders, "I need to know what's wrong."
"Why?" She focused on his tie, not wanting to look him in the eye. If she did, and if she saw the concern she knew was there, she'd break, and she didn't want to break.
"Because we made a commitment, baby. For better or worse. And right now, you're having a worst. I need to know so I can make you feel better." He tilted her chin up, and looked in her blue eyes. He kissed her sweetly, then brushed her bangs back. "Tell me what's wrong."
Linda sighed and looked down. She slipped from his grip and walked to the window. Her back towards him, she started talking. "What if you go to work, and I never see you again? What if you get hurt, and I don't get a chance to say goodbye? I'd never be able to talk to you, or hug you, or kiss you, or look into those handsome hazel eyes of yours. Which I know are showing concern right now." She turned around, tears welling in her eyes, "I don't want you dying!" She roughly rubbed her eye, "and now I'm crying and I don't want to cry! I'm sick and tired of crying! I'm sick of having nightmares! I'm tired of not being able to sleep! I'm sick and tired of hurting all the time! And I hate that I always end up snapping at you, cause I know you're doing your best! And I hate how I'm not being a good wife—"
"Wait a minute. Who says you're not being a good wife? I th-"
"I say! I can't cook without having to sit on a barstool. I can't do laundry without hurting. And I can't love you like you deserve cause I hate how the scars look, and you'll hate them too, and then you won't want to be with me. I jus' wan' things to go back to normal! They way they were, before I got shot."
Danny frowned and pulled his wife into his arms. He rocked her back and forth, kissing her head. "You're doing a great job, baby. Jack and Sean can help with dinner; it's high time those two learn to cook. And they can help with laundry, which is much easier to figure out than cooking. And, honey-" he sighed as she took in a ragged breath. "We agreed from the get-go that if one of us wasn't comfortable during sex, we'd stop right away."
"But you're mad because I'm not giving you any," Linda mumbled into his chest and through her tears.
"No, no, I'm not mad, Linda. I just want you to get better, and I can wait until you're ready to have sex again." Danny pulled back to look her in the eye, "right now, we're focusing on you. And I don't know how to help you, Linda. You have PTSD, and I understand that. A lot. But if you recall, I had no idea how to get over it."
She smirked in remembrance, "I remember."
"You need help from someone who can really help you... you and I both know I don't have the patience for that."
Linda chuckled, "you're not mad?"
"No, I'm not mad. I'm just concerned... how 'bout this, tomorrow, we'll call the shrink the hospital recommended. We'll see what she has to say, okay?"
"Okay.... I'm sorry I snapped at you. You don't deserve it."
"It's okay, Linda." Danny hugged her tightly, vowing he'd do anything to protect her and to help her out of her current state. He just had no idea she'd get worse before she got better...
YOU ARE READING
You Are On My Mind
Fanfiction"I woke up this morning, you were on my mind" ~~ We Five Third book of my 100 Ways To Say I Love You series. Apparently, there are a thousand plus ways to say I love you. Requests are very welcome! Danny and Linda Reagan through the years. Some chap...