You Are On My Mind

Open The Door

Somehow, not seeing her shot was so much more worse than watching the awful ordeal play out, Danny had concluded one night. Somehow, not knowing what had happened was so much better; that way, he wouldn't have to see it over and over again in the middle of the night in his dreams. He wouldn't have to see it in the middle of the day in his thoughts. He felt so guilty, despite everyone telling him he had nothing to do with it.
But that's the thing, he thought almost bitterly. I had everything to do with it.
No, you didn't. It was his wife's voice in his head again. It always popped up when he thought about that awful night. You had absolutely nothing to do with it. You were no where near the hospital-
But I should've been, Danny argued back, staring at his whiskey. Annoyed, frustrated, worried, and saddened, he did the only thing he knew how: hide behind something else.
Danny hated that after his military education, he closed up his emotional wall completely. He had always had a wall- Linda said it came with being a Reagan- but he wasn't so sure. When he had been shot on duty for the first time, he'd closed the walls. Years and years the walls were tightly sealed, only a few times did they crumble. He wasn't going to let the crumble this time, no sir. He downed the rest of the whiskey and put his glass in the sink. He walked up to his bedroom where he heard a sickeningly sad sob. It took him only a second to enter and find Linda not in the room.
Confused, Danny thought where she would be; then he remembered where she liked to cry. He pushed the door to the en-suite open, finding Linda on her knees with her face in her hands. She was visibly shaking as the sobs wouldn't stop. He instantly kneeled next to her, and put his hand on her shoulder.
"No!!" Linda screamed, falling off her knees and knocking into the tub. "No, don't touch me!"
"O-okay, okay, I won't touch you." Danny held up his hands, showing he was a friend not a foe. "I won't. Calm down, swe-"
"No!" She shouted again, this time louder, shrinking more towards the tub. "No! No, no, no!"
Danny tried desperately to calm her down before the kids woke up. "Linda. Linda! Linda, I'm gonna kiss you." It's worked before. He rubbed her cheek and placed his lips on hers. What he wasn't expecting was the slap of her hand against his cheek.
"No! Get away from me!"
"Dad?" Sean's voice sounded scared. His brother was behind him, looking horrified.
"What's wrong with Mom?" Jack almost whispered.
Danny looked at his sons then back to his screaming wife.
************
Linda stared at the white ceiling and white walls. She closed her eyes, concluding that she wasn't in her bedroom. She tried to move her arms, but they were stuck. She became panicked again when she realized she was in a straight jacket. With one breath of encouragement, she screamed, "Danny! Daaannnyyy!"
Outside the door, Danny pointed to the door. "Let me in."
"She could be dangerous," the nurse said.
"She's scared!"
"We can't let you in."
Her screams were heard again, prompting Sean to stand behind his Dad. He clung to his father's arm, wondering if his Mom would be okay.
"You have to." Jack said seriously, though the fear beneath was evident.
Danny heard her cries again, "please. She won't hurt me, I know."
The nurse raised an eyebrow, seeing the angry pink mark on his cheek.
"I've known her for half my life- over half my life. She wouldn't hurt me."
"Detective, she clearly isn't in her right mind. She needs-"
"Danny!" Linda's screams were getting louder and more hysterical. "Let me out!" She started kicking the door, "Danny!"
The detective looked to the nurse pleadingly. She only Cooly stared back at him. Frustrated, he pulled out his badge and gun. "You're gonna open that door. That's a police order."
"Sir-"
Danny closed his eyes in frustration, trying hard not to lash out like he did so well. He took a few moments to figure out what he was going to say. "Open the damned door."
"What door?" It was Linda's voice, right next to him. Her voice was calm with an air of tiredness in it.
"That door!"
"What?" When Danny didn't answer, she shrugged. "Must be dreaming."
He was, in fact, dreaming. When he would wake, he would realize that was one of the most vivid dreams he had ever had. A question would also come to mind: what was keeping Linda from suffering the same fate in the dream? The answer was most certainly not him; he had been Cross and prickly with her lately, and he decided he needed to change that. And change he would.