I'm now here in the Philippines and nothing really changed even though hindi ako nakauwi dito for 5 years. Kahapon lang ako dumating.
I'm now going to the hospital to visit my step-father but before going there, I decided to visit a friend which is Equinox, Xean's ex. Malapit na niyang matapos ang residency niya sa parehong hospital na pinagta-trabahuhan ni dad.
"Bro," Sabi ko at lumingon naman siya. Halata ang gulat sa mga mata nito.
"Veather!" He raised his hands in the air para mag apir at niyakap ako sabay tapik ng balikat ko.
"Kamusta, bro? Long time no see ah?" Pangangamusta niya.
"Eto, 5 years din nawala pero nagbabalik." I shrugged my shoulders.
"Let's hang-out later after my duty." Sabi niya kaya tumango naman ako.
"Naunahan mo ako. I'll chat you later. Punta muna ako kay dad." Sabi ko.
"Sige bro. Kitakits!" He waved goodbye kaya umalis na din ako. Liliko na sana ako papunta sa clinic ni dad pero may nakita akong pamilyar na likod.
Kahit hindi ito nakaharap sa akin ay kilalang kilala ko kung sino ito at hindi ako pwede magkamali. The elevator opened at pumasok siya. Walang ibang taong naga-abang kaya sinara na niya ito pero mabilis akong naglakad at hinarang ng kamay ko dahilan para mapigilan ko ang pagsara.
Sa pagbukas muli ng elevator ay nagtama ang mata namin.
God! How I missed that face of hers.
Natulala siya saglit at nahulog mula sa kamay niya ang cellphone. Dadamputin ko na sana pero naunahan niya ako kaya pumasok na lang ako sa loob.
We're at the both sides of the elevator, both facing in front of us. I can see in my peripheral vision that she seemed tense at pinipilit mag on ang cellphone niya.
Nag stop ang elevator sa 14th floor pero wala namang pumasok kaya kami pa rin dalawa ang sa loob nito.
"Kamusta kana?" I chose to break the silence.
It took her a few seconds before replying.
"I'm fine." Sabi niya.
"Can we talk?" Tumingin siya sa akin.
"About what?" She asked without looking at me this time.
"Us." I said without any hesitance.
I've hesitated being with her before. I lost her for half a decade already, I don't want to lose her permanently that's why as long as possible, as long as I'm breathing, I'm taking chances for her.
"I'm busy." She said without looking at me. Saktong bumukas ang elevator kaya naman tuloy-tuloy siya sa paglabas.
Eto yata ang sinasabi nila sa isang laro na 'saksak puso, tulo ang dugo'. Ang sakit eh.
Siguro ay kinasusuklamaan niya na talaga ako. She's really mad because of what I did.
Sinundan ko siya dahil hindi pwedeng palampasin ko nanaman ang pagkakataon na 'to.
She immediately went to her car and was about to go inside pero hinarangan ko siya.
"Are you still mad at me?" I asked.
"No." She said without looking at me. She's a very honest woman but I don't know if she's telling me the truth right now.
How can she not be mad at me? How can she not be mad of what I did?
BINABASA MO ANG
Breathing for Nicotine
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