"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" He asked, his voice cracked. He faced me and I saw tears stream down his gorgeous face.
Do I really have to leave him one day?
"Dahil alam kong masasaktan ka." I know that pain is part of living but why does it seems like I have to suffer from it every time?
Oo, gusto kong makaramdam ng sakit nuon pero hindi ko naman sinabing ganito. I didn't expected it to be this painful.
"Fuck, Sacē! Mas nasasaktan ako sa katotohanang wala ako sa tabi mo nung mga panahong kailangan mo ako!" His voice raised and his eyes are bloodshot right now.
"You could have told me earlier para kahit papano may nagawa man lang ako para sayo." He went to the right side and sat down on the chair. Sinundan ko siya at niyakap pero nakatingin parin siya sa harap.
"You've done a lot for me kaya huwag mong isipin na wala kapang nagagawa para sakin. You thought me how to live and not just survive and your love is enough."
I felt bad for keeping this a secret to him. I thought I could save him from being devastated but I ended up hurting him even more.
He hugged me back and kissed my forehead.
"I'm sorry, baby." I paused for awhile.
"I'm afraid I won't be able to marry you." I continued kaya kumalas siya sa pagkakayakap sa akin at hinawakan ako sa magkabilang balikat ko. He wiped his tears before speaking.
"I will marry you Sacē. No matter what happens, I will marry you." Giit niya kaya mas lalo akong naiyak.
He's so precious. I don't want to leave this person behind.
"Veyn, makinig ka." I cupped his face.
"Hindi na ako magtatagal. Stage 3A na ako at sobrang bilis ng pagkalat nito sa baga ko. I want to see you happy before I'm gone, even if that happiness no longer includes me." I smiled.
"Bakit sobrang dali para sayong sukuan ang sarili mo? Sacē, nandito na ako para samahan ka sa laban mo. I can't imagine myself married to someonelse that's not you. I want to grow old with you, Sacē."
"But I'm not going to grow old with you, Veyn! Limitado na yung oras ko dito sa mundo." I cried and he hugged me once again.
"Sace, listen to me. Gagaling kapa." He's trying to make me feel better pero mas lalo lang bibigat ang pakiramdam ko kapag paniniwalaan ko ang mga binibitawan niyang mga salita.
"I-it's too late, Veyn. I'm not going to get better." I stuttered. Nakakapanghina na.
I felt so weak. I don't know kung dahil ba yakap-yakap niya ako at alam kong may kasama na akong lumaban sa sakit ko o sa kadahilanang tanggap ko na ang mangyayari sa akin.
He hugged me tighter. I can feel his heartbeat.
"As the Earth revolve and rotates, as a person's feeling may change, life isn't always at the highest or lowest point so have faith, you'll get through it cause as long as you breathe and you have me," He paused for awhile and looked at me.
What did I do to deserve him?
"Baby, nothing's ever too late." He assured me and kissed my forehead.
Despite of what I witnessed before, him having sex with another girl, I can't hate him. My love for him overpowered to the point no matter what he did or will still do, I can't hate him. I might get hurt but I can't put hatred before or after his name in my heart.
BINABASA MO ANG
Breathing for Nicotine
General Fiction-Medicus Series No. 1- Sacē Furry Lacosta is a person who cannot feel pain, literally. Physical pain isn't her enemy, but her self is. She's not only numb outside, but also on the inside. She's broken and lost until help come on its way, Nystagmus...
