Swan dive // Izuku fan fiction

26

Bakugou's POV
"I uh don't know what to say. How do you feel after you saw him?"

"I guess I missed him. I don't know if it's my guilt, it's not the first time I've seen or talked to him honestly" I said, my eyes widen to what I had just admitted

"What? What do you mean you've seen him before"

"It was a long time ago, now that I'm thinking about it I think I was crazy." I finished up my plate and got up. Shoto reached for my wrist and stopped me.

"Wait, just talk to me please. I know this must be a lot for you"

God I don't deserve you.

I sit back down and take a sip off my tea.

"The day he died, I punched the concrete so bad because I'm the reason why he died. I began to run out of frustration and ended up somewhere in a forest. I sat down and just concentrated in Izuku and only him. It was quiet as well, and he appeared. But like I said I was probably imagining him."

"Did you ask him if it was?"

"Well no. We mostly just talked about what we have done over the years. He was there for our wedding, some of our missions, just not privet ones. I don't know what else because Yui became tired."

"I want to see him." I looked at him in a bit of shock.

"You want to see him?"

"Yes, I know we were never close enough when he first started school. But I have regret for not doing anything either"

"What do you mean?"

"I was worried of him not trying his best in class. He's in the heroes course with us, and everyone has the same goal. But he was either sleeping in class or dozing off. I wanted to check on him but I thought it was none of my business. One time I went to the roof because the weather was nice and I saw him smoking. I didn't stop him, I just left because it bothered me.

When we were told what had happened to him, I felt guilty for not trying. Suicidal people are in front of us sometimes that we don't even notice the signs they clearly gave. I didn't notice until after" tears began to form on his eyes, he squeezed my hand lightly.

"I want to save people who are in physical danger and if I can those who are emotionally I'm danger like Izuku. That's why I always try my best to check on my friends or co workers"

You barely knew him yet your carried this guilt for so long and used it to fuel your strength to save people.

We stayed silent for a while. Shoto let go of my hands and whipped his tears. I got up and took our plates and cups. I placed the dishes in the dish washer and sat next to him again at the table still in silence.

"Remember you told me that when it was too late you realized you loved him? Romantically?" Shoto started

"Ummm yea I think so" I squeeze my hands under the table.

"Do you.. still love him?" I took a deep breath and thought to myself for a minute.

Do I? Is it just a vague feeling? I was a kid when I loved him, I haven't talked to him or seen him in person constantly to catch any kind of romantic feelings for him.

"I don't, I was a kid when I felt that way. I haven't had any contact with him to keep those feelings alive. I married you because we got to know each other and love each other over the years. Nothing will change that" he looked down at the table and nodded.

"What was the first thing you felt when you saw him?"

"Well, shock? Maybe, I'm not sure. I don't remember really, I still can't believe Yui can do something like that"