truth or dare? (lashton hemwin)

chapter 3.

chapter 3!!

as always, let me know about mistakes.

wednesday

~ ashton's pov ~

another day, another chance to embarrass myself in front of luke. eh, he probably won't notice me anyway. at this point, i can't tell which one is worse

it is currently 2 a.m. on a very cold and rainy wednesday, and i can't fucking sleep. my insomnia has just kept getting worse and worse over the past couple weeks. i look out the window, and all i see is a couple of rain drops on my window and the pitch black sky. although all i see is black, i can't seem to get those perfect blue eyes off my mind.

it feels like my only thoughts for the past two days have been, LUKE LUKE LUKE, and i don't know why. i mean, it's not like monday was the first time i ever saw him. maybe it's because he finally talked to me? ugh, i don't fucking know.

two more hours pass, and i still can't manage to go to sleep. at the moment, i'm thinking about stupid embarrassing things i did as a child. like that one time i accidentally called my teacher mom. oh, the embarrassment. 

i know i'm not going to be able to sleep, so i guess i can start getting ready. after i pick out my clothes, i step into my warm shower. my eyes can't help but travel down my body, examining all of my bruises, cuts, fading scars, and a couple of cigarette burns here and there. all i can think about is how i deserve each and every one of them. and more, i could always use more. always.

my razor taunts me out of the corner of my eye until i finally give in, sighing in satisfaction as the cool blade meets my skin. 

when i can't see red anymore, i step out of the shower and grab a towel. i lie in my bed, just like that, for another 30 minutes, staring up at the ceiling. it finally stopped raining, but i kind of miss it. is it weird that i'm hoping for luke to barge into my room and demand for me to cuddle with him? probably, but i don't care.

unfortunately, luke never comes, but was i really expecting him to? anyway, i finally get out of bed and get dressed in black skinny jeans, a maroon sweatshirt, and a beanie because i'm too lazy to fix my hair right now. 

i hear a shoe hit my window, a sound i've become more familiar with since monday. i stroll over to the window, seeing my best friend putting on her shoe. she's very much struggling because she's standing up, trying not to get wet.

"why do you feel the need to throw your shoe when we both have phones?"

"well, first of all, it's fun. second of all, my phone is currently dead. and third of all, i know that you always put your phone on do not disturb before you go to bed, so you wouldn't have heard my message or call even if my phone was charged," she replies, completely prepared to answer my dumb question with factual evidence.

damn. she's good. she's knows me better than i know myself. 

"damn. anyway, i'll be out in a sec. i got to get my shoes."

"i'm not in a hurry, so take your time!" she calls as she gets back in the car.

even though she told me not to, i rush down the stairs after i get my shoes on. i turn to go into the kitchen to get some food when an angry man stops me. i gulp.

"hey fatty, where you going? gonna get some food for that pathetic body of yours?" he sneers.

"y-yes gary. i was j-just getting some f-food." again with the fucking stutter!