Hear the mind's need

Chapter 1

"Maganda nga, maarte naman." rinig ko ang bulungan ng ibang mga babae na nadaanan ko.

Kung bulong ba iyon? For sure, pinaparinig talaga nila.

Hindi ko na pinansin ang mga ito. I'm used to it anyway, simula noong hindi ko na tinuloy ang pakikipag-kaibigan sa mga naging kasama. Puro kasi boys at walang kwentang bagay ang mga pinag-uusapan nila. Some of their crushes try to hit on me kaya kahit noong nakakausap ko pa sila ay hindi na maganda ang pagsasama namin.

As they said, I am boring when it comes to my choices of interest. I beg to disagree. Hindi boring ang mga bagay na mas gusto kong pagtuunan ng pansin. Things that makes me enjoy is just not their cup of tea. Ganoon naman 'di ba? Magkakaiba ang hilig ng mga tao. Some of the things that are enjoyed by some are ridiculous to others. Like me, boys are not interesting!

I just think our attention should be based more on stuffs that make sense. Boys make sense at some point but being in first year of senior highschool should make us explore other than their attractiveness? Ngumiwi ako ng maalala ang assumption sa akin. I'm not asexual, but receiving a lot of attention from a lot of them is maybe a factor that I don't find it exciting. I find a lot of guys attractive, pero hanggang doon lang. 

Ayoko na sila isipin, hindi rin naman worth it.  Okay pa rin naman akong naglalakad ngayon kahit mag-isa. I'm not bitter like these girls around me. It will always be better to be alone than be accompanied with fake people.

"Zallistine!"

Napahinto ako ng may tumawag sa akin, that familiar annoying voice. Ano nanaman kailangan ng lalaking ito?

"What?" mataray ang naging boses ko.

Sumabay siya sa akin sa paglalakad kaya tuluyan akong napairap.

"Hatid na kita,"

Oh my gosh.

Ito nanaman, I told him to stop annoying me. How many times should I tell him not to court me because I don't like it. He has looks, he's almost the same height with me. Mas matangkad lang siya nang kaunti. He can get other girls' attention, just not mine because I'm not interested to deal with these kind of stuffs yet! 

I've always believed, there's time for that. Iyon ang laging reminder ng parents ko sa akin dati. It was engraved to my whole being. Hindi ko naman pinipilit ang sarili kong hindi sila pansinin, hindi ko talaga gusto. I am in need of friendship not this, and they can't offer me that. 

Isa pa, I don't want to be friends with a guy like him! So nakakairita! Buti pa the other guys know how to stop.

"Ayoko. I have my own lakad pa," sagot ko.

Hindi ko na siya hinintay magsalita at mabilis na lumakad para lampasan pero nang mapansing susunod pa siya ay agad na akong tumakbo. I groaned. Kainis naman, I have to make pawis pa tuloy. I have to make effort pa just to shoo him away.

Dumeretso ako sa 'di kalayuang coffee shop pagkalabas ng school. There are a lot of coffee shops here while this one is the most unpopular kaya naman ay mas kakaunti ang pumapasok rito but enough for the business to make profit. Maganda naman ang ambiance, sadyang the students will choose to go to the most expensive because of their image. Luminga ako sa entrance door. I have to make sure he didn't come after me. Ganoon na lang ang disappointment ko nang makita siyang papunta rito.

This is making me hate him na ah, I don't even know his name. Basta ang naalala ko, cousin siya ng kaklase ko. I breathed slowly and quickly scan the place to find a way to get rid of him. Lumipad ang paningin ko sa pamilyar na lalaking naka-upo sa harap ng laptop. He's here! 

Agad sumilay ang ngiti sa akin, walang pagdadalawang-isip akong lumapit.

"Uh. Excuse me," agaw ko sa atensyon niya. "Can you help me? Please pretend naman na I'm with you," mabilis na paliwanag ko sa lalaking nakita ko sa party noong nakaraan buwan nang maupo ako bigla sa vacant seat na nasa gilid niya.