He's my Superstar

24

KESHA'S

I felt the cold breeze in today's weather in Paris. Autumn na kasi. It is much cooler now.

I am wearing a black jeans with white shirt, I tucked it in and I also wear my color cream trench coat. I am having a coffee right now in one of the cafè in the street of Paris.

It's been two weeks since I left Philippines for this. Of course, my family knew as well as Judith and my co-workers at Style Press. I doubt that Sky already knew. Pwera na lang kung... sasabihin ni Psalm.

Nag-aadjust pa rin ako. Sa weather, sa environment, sa language, sa lifestyle... to almost all things. Pero nabawasan ang pag-iisip ko tungkol sa mga bagay bagay. Minsan iniisip ko pa rin, kamusta na kaya siya?

Pinilig ko ang ulo ko para huwag na munang mag-isip tungkol doon. Start na rin kasi ngayon ng training ko kay Ms. Ricafort. And I have to do my best.

I paid my coffee and start my day. Haay, this is it!

--

SKY'S

My concert last week was successful. Naging busy ako pagkatapos noon dahil panay ang interviews at presscons ko. And now, I have my free day, finally!

Balak kong puntahan si Kesha ngayon. Pero bago ang lahat, dumaan muna ako sa Studio. I want to talk to my management about her. Maybe it's time... time for me to introduce my real girlfriend to the world. Hindi ko kayang mawala si Kesha sa akin nang tuluyan.

As usual, nag hysterical nanaman si Colin.

"Sky, you can't! Sa mata ng tao, si Monique ang girlfriend mo!"

"That's why I want to make it right. Please? I don't want to lose her. She's too important to me."

"No, we're not arguing about this. I will not agree to your plan!" He said with finality.

Sumagot din ngayon si Mr. Valderrama. "Yeah, don't you think your career is important? You'll lose this all pag ginawa mo 'yan."

"Yun na nga ang point ko! Why mess up kung andyan ka na! Always remember why you started." Colin said.

"She's the reason why I started this." Mahina kong sabi.

"Sky, gumising ka. Huwag puro puso. At tsaka hindi ba break na kayo? Hayaan mo na siya. What's the point kung magkakabalikan kayo? You don't need her with this. Isa pa, you're gonna renew your contract to us in just three months."

Sa sinabi ni Colin, that's my end point. I can't take it anymore. He doesn't have the right to say all of that.

Tumayo ako at humarap sa kanya. "That's it! Sawa na akong pagsabihan niyo siya ng hindi maganda. I love my career, yes. And I respect you all. But you've got to respect her, too. I love her. So much. And yes, more than this career."

"Ayoko na lang pumirma ng kontrata kung ganoon. I'd like to lose my career than losing her. And maybe you don't have that something so special that you're afraid to lose that thing that's why you can say that."

Umalis na ako pagkatapos noon. Narinig ko ang pagtawag nila sa akin pero hindi na ako lumingon pa.

"Sky! Bumalik ka dito!" Sigaw ni Colin.

I tried to contact Kesha but I cannot reach her. I really need to talk to her. I drive my way to Style Press. Pupuntahan ko na lang siya. I wear my shades pagbaba ko ng kotse. Nagtinginan sa akin ang ibang staff, nagpapicture pa ang ilang nakakilala sa akin, hinayaan ko naman iyon.

Bago pa ako makarating ay may nakasalubong ako na babae. Mga nasa edad din namin ni Kesh at halos kasing-tangkad din niya.

"Sky?" Tawag niya sa akin. Nagtaka naman ako, kasi hindi ko siya kilala.

Mayamaya pa, nahalata niya ata ang pagtataka ko. "Oh, sorry. I'm Judith." She extends a hand, inabot ko naman iyon.

"Kesha's Assistant Fashion Designer slash colleague slash best friend. Sorry kung nagulat kita, nakukwento ka kasi niya sa akin."

Napahawak ako sa batok dahil sa hiya. "Ganoon ba? Sorry din. Naikukwento ka nga din ni Kesh, ngayon nga lang tayo nagkita in-person. Anyway, andito ba si Kesh? Gusto ko sana siyang makita."

Pinapasok niya ako sa office niya. "So... Kesh didn't told you?" Tanong niya.

"Told what?" Kinabahan ako doon.

She sighed. "Tinanggap kasi ni Kesh yung offer sa kanya sa Paris. It's been two weeks since she left. Sorry. Hindi niyo ata ito napag-usapan. Summer pa lang kasi inoffer na 'yun sa kanya. Hindi niya lang kinuha kasi, you need her here. And then she got the offered again. She'll be there for two years." She explained. I can't take all of the information she just said.

I thanked her at umalis na.

How can I be that selfish? Hindi niya nagawang sabihin dahil sakin... I remembered our last date before our Anniversary. Iyon siguro yung sasabihin niya dapat. Pero hindi niya nagawang sabihin sakin kasi nauna akong magsabi sa kanya.

Shet.. if I only knew, I would've support her, too.

She's always there for me. But where am I for her?

Nahampas ko ang manubela ng sasakyan ko. I have so many regrets. And now, I don't know how to make things right.

Tumatawag si Psalm sa akin kaya sinagot ko iyon.

"Kuys, alam mo na ba? Nasa Paris daw si Ate Kesha?"

I composed myself before answering. "Yeah. I just knew now."

"Okay ka lang ba?"

No, I'm not.

"Yeah, yeah." I said to him and I hang up after that.

(Play: Stars by Callalily in multimedia :) )

I'm saying I love you again, are you listening?

If only you could feel my love again

The stars

In the sky will never be the same
If only you were here..

I'm literally crying now...

Pagdating ko sa condo, nandoon sila Mico.

"Hey." Lapit ni Mico sa akin. Lumapit na rin ang lahat.

"I'm so selfish, bro. I can't forgive myself."

"Hey, kumalma ka, okay. Let's plan everything out. We'll help you."

Kinuha ni Lance ang susi ng unit ko sa bulsa ko at binuksan iyon. Nang tumigil ako sa pag-iyak, tinanong na nila ako.

"Anong plano mo ngayon?" Mico asked.

Umiling ako. "I don't know, bro. I don't even know if I can make things right."

"Of course, you can. Huwag ka ngang nega! Tutulungan ka namin." Sabi ni Lance.

"Sorry, Kuys. Ngayon ko lang din nalaman, eh." Sabi ni Psalm.

"Hey, okay lang. Wala kang kasalanan." I assured him.

"I want her to achieve her dreams, too. She deserves it." I said.

"Then do it." Sabi ni Ced.

Tumango ako sa kanya. "Gusto ko na ring umalis sa Music. This doesn't make sense anymore."

"O teka, huwag kang padalos-dalos. We'll make a way. Pwede namang agency lang ang palitan mo. 'Di mo kailangang umalis. This is your dream. At sigurado ako na hindi matutuwa si Kesha kapag ginawa mo 'yung gusto mo."

Mico have a point. 

"We'll help you, don't worry." Sabi pa niya.

"Really?" I asked.

"Really."