The Lost Helianthus (COMPLETED)

Chapter Thirteen

"What are we doing here?" Pinanood ko lang si Alek na maupo sa harapan ko.

Sa dalawang araw na walang pasok, nakapag-isip isip ako kung ano ang dapat gawin. During those two days, I am able to formulate my plan easily with how to deal with our situation.

Normal pa rin naman ang pakikitungo namin sa isa't isa ni Alek. Pero mararamdaman mong may kaunting pagbabago. Walang ilangan. Heto nga at walang hiya kung lumapit ang lalaking ito.

"We are here to talk about things."

I made it clear to him that it's urgent. Pagkatapos kasi nang class namin sa FABM1 ay dumiretso muna ako sa klase kung nasaan sina Alek. I commanded him to meet me here in the library after his class. Vacant naman kasi ang sumunod kaya walang problema.

"Bakit dito pa?"

"People inside the classroom may find us suspicious. Ayaw ko na mag-iisip sila ng kung ano."

Naasar ako bigla nang tumawa siya nang mahina kaya sinipa ko ang tuhod niya. Tumigil naman siya agad ngunit may mapaglarong ngiti ang labi niya.

I really hate when he's this carefree. Why can't he just go back from being serious and quiet lad I know?

"But our classmates know that we are close. Normal lang sa kanila na nag-uusap tayo nang ganito kalapit. They are not saying anything when we are seated next to each other even before. You are the one who's giving us the thought of suspicion. Ikaw lang ang nag-iisip ng kung ano sa ating dalawa."

Naramdaman ko ang pag-init ng pisngi ko kaya bago pa niya mapansin iyon, agad akong tumungo. I played with my fingers below the table when I couldn't control my nervousness.

"You want to give me a pep talk, aren't you?"

Marahas kong iniangat ang tingin patungo sa kanya. "Pep talk?"

"I wa feeling down last Friday and I want to talk about it with you, but I don't want to annoy you anymore."

Tumaas ang isa kong kilay. "So, you are aware that you are irritating me."

Isang matamis na ngiti ang iginawad niya sa akin. He didn't even deny it.

"Papansin," bulong ko.

"I just want your attention."

I tried to play it cool, but little did he know that I am now clenching my hand because of the emotions he's bringing to me.

"What do you want to talk about?"

"About not bagging the first place," mahina niyang sabi. Itinukod ko ang siko ko sa mesa at pinaglapat ang mga daliri ko.

Hmmm... this is getting interesting.

I leaned forward so I can hear everything more clearly.

"And then?"

Bumaba ang tingin niya sa mesa. I don't know what's worthy to see there than me.

What he's dealing with must be so sensitive.

"I feel like I am a disappointment. If I'm not the best, parang isa akong malaking dismaya sa mga parents ko." I observed how his eyes became sadder when he brought up his parents.

Ah, academic pressure and validation.

Ngumiti ako sa kanya at tinapik ang balikat niya. "Stop feeling like you are a disappointment... becase you truly are a disappointment." Ngumisi ako nang tumitig lang siya sa akin.

Natawa ako nang mahina dahil sumama bigla ang tingin niya sa akin. I think that's the first time he was annoyed at me. Ang... cute.

"What? Did I say something wrong?" I acted clueless.