Shivley: A Now United Story

Ch 17: epiphany

I've clearly been listening to Folklore by Taylor Swift on repeat which explains my chapter titles :) I decided to finish up the chapter from last time and the next chapter will be the ball. I don't mean to drag it out so much, but I feel like the character of Shivani had been going through this wild experience and hadn't really stopped to process any of it, so that's what this chapter is really about.

She could've been incredibly petty. Probably called out Bailey for the conversation she'd overheard. Or thrown Ashlee under the bus. But just before it was her turn she looked over at Hina. Then she glanced at Noah and AC and a realization hit her. She was so busy blaming Bailey and Ashlee for the drama, and she hadn't fully stopped to think about all the amazing people she'd met.

If she used this moment to call someone out or throw shade, she really was no better than Bailey who wanted to use Shivani for his image. If she could change one thing she realized it wasn't the fact that she'd kissed Bailey. 

She leaned forward towards the mic. "If I could change one thing about this week, it would be my perspective throughout this journey so far. I got so caught up in everything that I forgot to take a moment to just take it all in. I've made some amazing friends so far and this whole experience has been beyond surreal. Actually backstage I was just thinking about how two weeks ago I was watching YouTube videos of old Vampire Diaries Comic Con panels and now I'm actually here! Well, I'm not a vampire or at Comic Con, but you get what I mean." 

The audience gave a little laugh and Hina smile grew wide when Shivani made eye contact with her.

"And I know it's only been a week and everyone is probably going to think I'm ridiculous for saying this, but I've learned a lot about myself. Truly. I'm excited to hopefully continue learning and growing through this process and I'm especially excited to learn new dance styles soon! And I know this was a long answer, but I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you to everyone here to Simon to Kyle to you and to Shawn who's backstage keeping everything together and I'm going to stop talking now." She awkwardly laughed and leaned back.

Everyone broke out into applause, as they did after everyone's answer. But Shivani saw a strange look cross Simon and Kyle's face. Uh oh. Did she talk too much? Did they realize she wasn't Now United material? Oh no. Then she took a deep breath in reminding herself that she couldn't control what was going to happen and she would just have to focus at being in the moment. 

"...so yeah I wouldn't change anything so much as I'm excited to play the guitar and explore other artistic skills in the future with other members." Noah smiled and leaned back. The standard applause followed. Shivani hadn't realized that Noah could play the guitar; she would definitely have to convince him to play for he later. 

Ashlee went next. "Well I appreciate most things I have gained from this week. I do think some people have been hostile to me about my beliefs so I wish we could have had a warmer environment. I think it's easy for a lot of people to make assumptions about me because I'm a farmer and because of the political views of the community I live in. But I really am trying to understand the world even if I don't always come off that way. So yeah."

The standard applause followed.

"Thank you Ashlee for sharing. Alright you all have done wonderfully and we want to thank you all so much for being here! Without further ado, it is now time for the dinner and ball. Can we have the groups in the audience follow Simon and Kyle out to the ballroom?" 

They all got up from their seats filing out in the center aisle behind Kyle and Simon. 

"Now the group on the stage, would you all mind following Shawn to the ballroom?"

Ashlee got up first, then Noah, then Shivani, and so on and they followed Shawn who still seemed frazzled with her earpiece and clipboard, but she made sure they were all there and guided them to the ballroom. They walked back into the room with the giant chandelier and waiters walking around with food. The other groups were there as well. 

"All right guys feel free to eat, you have about thirty minutes then we'll open the ballroom doors and the rest of the night is yours!" Shawn clapped her hands together and gestured towards the tables set up with their fancy cutlery sets. "Oh and sit wherever you want!"

Shivani was about to go find Hina, but Shawn asked if she could speak to her really quickly. Shivani nodded and stayed back. Noah glanced back giving her a confused look and Shivani shrugged back. 

"I'll save you a seat!" Noah turned back and Shivani was happy to see Sina was walking with him.

Shivani turned towards Shawn who had tears in her eyes. "Whew! I'm sorry I'm usually not like this but...," she wiped her eyes and shook her head. "...thank you. This is the first time I've been thanked like that. Usually I'm the crazy clipboard lady and I'm pretty invisible, and I don't mean to be like this, but it's stressful you know? Like when you're a moderator, you just worry about questions. But when you're the stage manager, you watch over the talent, moderator, stage hands, reporters, cameramen... and just about everything and whew sorry! You're probably hungry, but thank you really." 

Shivani didn't really know what to say because she hadn't realized a simple thank you would go that far. She really needed to start paying attention to the people around her. Shawn surprised Shivani with a hug, then she pulled away and wiped away her tears.

Shivani smiled at her. "I really meant it you know? Thanks and you're doing a great job." 

Shawn was still wiping her tears, "I'm such a mess oh my gosh. Okay I'm going to go clean up, but enjoy your dinner! And the dance and if you need anything, don't hesitate to ask for me, okay?"

Shivani nodded and waved bye making her way to the tables. She made a beeline towards the empty seat beside Noah. Hina, Sina, AC, Heyoon, Leilani, and Kenneth were also at the table. 

"Shivani you have got to try this salad! It's Greek I think, but you really got to try it!" Hina was putting it on Shivani's plate as she sat down.

"No way! The Caesar is way better!" Noah started dumping Caesar salad on her plate at the same time.

"Guys I'm sure they're both great, but I really can't eat this much salad." Hina and Noah paused and everyone burst out laughing. There was a mound of salad on Shivani's plate.

As Shivani looked around the table she smiled. She was so lucky.