Convergent; After Allegiant

Chapter 16

We decided to start with the Ferris wheel, so I'm currently on the train with Tobias heading to Navy Pier. Tobias sits with his back pressed against the wall of the train car and I sit across from him. Though we face eachother neither of us looks into the others eyes, Im to afraid of what I would find there. I'm worried that I won't see that comforting flash of love that usually resides in his beautiful blue eyes. I'm scared that I'll see his eyes staring blankly at me, not caring that he's broken my heart over again.

The train reaches the Pier and Tobias and I spring off, we both land on our feet which is suprising and kind of infuriating. The man can remember how to jump off of a moving train but cant remember me. Thats nice. Of course, that's something that's been ingrained in his brain for two years whereas he'd only known me for a few months. Oddly enough, it was only three months, those three months allowed me to see his brilliance and adoration. That short time allowed me to see how much I love him. Out feet slap the ground as we sprint to the Ferris wheel. Tobias runs beside me while we go, his feet sliding over the loose gravel.

Gravel crunches under the soles of our shoes as we stop in front of the ladder which stretches high intro the air, skimming the clouds. My hands close around the rusted and chipping rings as I pull myself skyward. Halfway up the wheel Tobias's breathing escalates and he grips the rings so hard that his knuckles turn white. If I close my eyes now I could pretend that we were climbing the wheel, before the war, searching for the flag from the other team. I see the shining light across the way, exposing the position of the enemy team. I see the glinting glass of the erudite building, shining into the peer, illuminating the dilapidated attractions spread through the grounds. But, the moment my eyes snap open again I am reminded of our challange here.

Slowly, I scoot into the cross beam and make myself comfortable. Tobias slides in shortly after, face red and knuckles white.

"Why exactly are we doing this again?" Tobias asks

" Trying to jog your memory." I explain

"What does this place have to do with anything?"

"During my initiation we climbed this together, it was... well it was important" I say.

" How so?" He asks

" Well, I learned one of your fears here, Hights. I guess this is where I realized I l... didn't really know you. I realized you weren't as scary as I thought."

" What are my fears?"

" Hmm... you have four, hence the nickname. Heights, Confinement, Murder of the Innocent and your father" I list, counting on my finger as I go " The third one changed though, it, last time I saw, was me dying"

" You dying? Why would that matter so much. Why are you so important to me?"

" I... I guess I was different than the others. The other initiates were scared of you whereas I wasn't. We were... we were good friends."

I need to tell him. This won't help anything if I don't.

Not long after that Tobias and I are firmly on the ground and on the way back to the compound.

Once on the train, I turn to Tobias, hoping for progress.

"Anything ring a bell?" I ask hesitantly.

"No nothing really" he replies. I sigh deeply.

" Well there's always other places." I say, trying to convince myself more than him.

"Why are you so keen on getting my memory back?" He asks. I suppose it's time to tell him.

" Before I died, we uh well we were together. Like as in a couple." I mutter

"Tris why didn't you say that before? I would have-"

" I didn't want you to feel obligated to be with me. I didn't want something fake."

The rest of the ride is quiet as t the walk through the compound. That is, until we run into a erudite who is breathing hard, like he ran here from Erudite.

" Anonymous troops... attacked the compound... destroyed the resurgence serum." He pants. Before I know what I'm doing my feet start me on the path to Erudite. The hard pounding of footsteps behind me tells me that Tobias followed.