in your eyes

chapter six

ara

i put down my pen and leaned back on the seat, my knees to my chest, basking under the warmth of the sun. it was a warmer day today. i was sat on a wooden seat outside the motel. it was sunrise. lorenz was still asleep and i was wearing his jacket. the morning air was sweet, the colours red, pink and yellow swirling on a big blue canvas above me. in that moment, there was nowhere i'd rather be.

"you're up early."

the voice startled me as i turned to look at him. lorenz stood in the door frame, his hair a mess and his face puffy.

he sat down next to me.

"it's beautiful," i mumbled, staring at the sky.

"it is," he muttered looking at me, which made me wonder if we were talking about the same thing.

"why'd you wake up?"

"well, when i opened my eyes you weren't in bed..." he breathed. "and i couldn't fall asleep so i got up."

i nodded, trying to hide how much that sentence meant to me.

"you know this is the first time i've ever seen a sunrise."

"really?" i asked, surprised to hear what he said.

he nodded. "and there is no one i'd rather see my first sunrise with than you."

i tried to hide the smile that crept onto my face.

"what are you writing?" he asked, motioning to the notebook in my hand.

"oh nothin-"

he took the book out of my hand before i could finish my sentence. "let's read."

"no, no! give it back lorenz!" i exclaimed, trying to pull it out of his hand but he easily gripped both my wrists with one hand, forcing me to stay still.

"it reads; lorenz is a very handsome man with his big muscles and honey brown eyes," he made up as he read, causing me to give him a bored look. "aw, ara you shouldn't have."

"ha ha," i laughed sarcastically. "now give it back."

"he looked at her like she was the sun, in that he never looked at her except frustration. he basked in her warmth, he complained when she was gone, but never looked. on days she was muted, he complained. on days she was stronger, he hid from her. he never looked at her until she was leaving, and in the beauty of the sunset he wondered how he'd never seen her before."

i sunk in my seat, embarrassed about what he'd just read. no one else had ever read anything in that notebook, lorenz was the first.

"these are amazing," he whispered, his eyes scanning the pages. his words brought a smile to my face. "you're amazing."

i did a double take. "sorry?"

"no not you, like what you wrote," he said, stumbling over his words. "not that you're not amazing, but what you wrote. fuck i'm sorry."

i let a loud, unattractive laugh escape my mouth because i'd never seen lorenz so flustered. i mean, i had just met him just two days ago.

"oh fuck off man, will you." he stood up and walked away back into the motel while i sat there laughing at how stupid he was sometimes.

a notification from my phone grasped my attention. a text from abby.

i'm coming to see you today. be ready ;)

i smiled at the text.

she reminded me of every good day i've ever had. every summer spent in fields of grass. every sunrise we admired together. every sunset. she smelt like dew and looked like light. and when she spoke, it was like someone slowly plucking the strings of a guitar, a sadly beautiful song starting to play, all my own. and i loved her.