Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust

chapter 24

CHAPTER 24

HOLLY’S P.O.V

Hudson balik from KK three days ago… Dia baru turun dari bilik Joshua after putting Joshua to sleep… Joshua sangat-sangat rapat dengan Hudson maybe sebab Hudson satu-satunya close to a father that Joshua ever had…

Sejak saya melahirkan Joshua, I moved to Uncle Harrison and Aunty Mea’s mansion…

“Hol…” suara Hudson lembut…

“Mmm?” saya sedang browsing Amazon, mau beli cute pyjamas for Joshua… online shopping is so convenient… 😝

“I’m going back to KK tomorrow morning… You should come back with me… and Joshua…” Hudson memujuk saya balik KK…

“Mmm…” saja saya jawab… cepat juga ni orang balik KK lagi….

“Hol…” Hudson memujuk lagi… “it’s been more than 3 years… forgive your dad…”

“who am I to forgive, Hud…?” sama masih sibuk on my handphone… “I’m only a daughter…”

“just open your heart and forgive him, Hol…“ Hudson masih on that same topic… “we’re both married… it’s not only you who were married off, look at me, Hol… but I accepted the fact and carried on...”

Saya berdengus…  I just want to let this go…

“Hol…” saya finally looked up at Hudson… He tucked a few strands of my hair behind my ear… “what if Jason is alive?”

OMG, Hudson! Apa lagi ni?!

“hahahaha…” saya ketawa paksa…

“I’m serious, Hol…” Serious muka Hudson… “would you forgive him?”

“stop, Hud…” Saya memejamkan mata … “don’t ask about stuff that is unreal…”

“just answer me, Hol…” memaksa juga Hudson ni…

“I can’t…” Saya buka mata saya…
“why can’t you?” Oh God, Hudson!
“it’s impossible, Hud!” saya terteriak…

“just close your eyes and imagine… if he’s actually still alive in these 3 years… back in KK, back to his old life, his job…” kenapa Hudson memaksa saya to think about Jason ni? 😒

“I would never forgive him if he is still alive and living his life like nothing happened!”

No! enough is enough, kesakitan yang saya rasa tidak akan mengatasi apa-apa pun… tiba-tiba Hudson berdiri dari sofa…

“where are you going?” pantas saya tanya dia….

“sleep…” he answered coldly…
“Hud…” he ignored me and just went up…

***

Next day…

Awal lagi saya masuk office… Yes, eventually saya terpaksa takeover part of my family business… saya terpaksa mengetepikan my love for music….

What do I expect? I’m a mother already… tidakkan seorang ibu masih stuck with her fantasies of love and music while raising a 3 year-old child… Joshua’s coming to 4 years old sudah dan tidak lama my little boy akan bersekolah…

TOK TOK TOK

Kedengaran pintu office saya diketuk dari luar…

“come in… saya menyahut dari dalam…

The clicking sound of someone’s shoes made me look up from my documents on the desk…

“princess…” Hudson? Sedih air muka dia….