Chef's Ambition (Hirai Momo x Female Reader)

Chapter 6

Note: Y/B/N = Your Best Friend's name

Wednesday Afternoon

Y/N'S POV

A lot... has happened since my birthday dinner. The 10 of us sat around in the living room after we ate and left the dishes to wash in the dishwasher. We just talked about random things; it was mostly my unnies telling embarrassing stories to Momo-unnie's group. I didn't really like it but... Momo-unnie seemed to enjoy the stories, so I guess... it is fine.

Just seeing everyone happy and laughing while celebrating my birthday made me feel... a little happy. I wanted to cry yet again, but this time... out of genuine joy. It was a weird feeling because the past two and a half years have been full of tears of suffering. My unnies made the pain bearable, and I continued on because I had them there to support me.

Momo-unnie coming into my life has been... a rollercoaster so far. I didn't want anything to do with her at first but... that's changed. She comforted me after I had my nightmare, and, for once, I felt safe. Not the protective kind that my unnies show me, but a comforting and... loving? Kind of safe. I can't say that I fully trust her, but she has shown that I have good reason to trust her. My heart hasn't felt so... at ease... in such a long time.

It was quite obvious to me that Momo-unnie... has developed feelings for me. She said that it is in her nature to be nice which I have seen from the way she treats my unnies and Mina-unnie; but the way she treats me is clearly different. There seems to be an element of loving care in her actions. I could chalk it up to the fact that everyone else is in a relationship and what not, but Momo said "because I lo---" when she found me at the park. I'm not the brightest person, but it was very obvious that she meant to say "love".

I don't know how I feel about Momo-unnie having feelings for me... It just feels weird to have someone like you after knowing about your traumatic past. I am not sure about my feelings for her either, beside my still slight distrust in her. I am definitely not ready for a relationship... and I am scared that my last relationship will just repeat itself... I know I shouldn't think like this and I promised Elkie-unnie that I would try to be open again but... thinking about a relationship brings back bad memories... To the point that I want to hide away again and cry myself to sleep like I did for an entire week after escaping from my ex.

The only thing I know for certain is that Momo-unnie's presence has been a blessing. It has been over one week since my last nightmare episode, and I have to logically attribute it to the routine of cuddling in our sleep that I developed with Momo-unnie. Jihyo and Tzuyu-unnie have pulled me to the side, and we have discussed how weird it has been that my guaranteed once-a-week nightmare has not happened yet. The three of us didn't spend too much time on the topic and decided to just monitor the situation.

Speaking of Momo-unnie, I was now walking to school with her. It seems like our schedules sometimes overlap on Wednesday, so Jihyo-unnie asked Momo-unnie to accompany me to and from school when she can. It was a nice change of pace as I almost always ended up going to and from school by myself. Momo-unnie's presence provided some reassurance of safety for me.

After everything that has happened over the past two and a half years, I have been scared that something bad will happen to me. The restraining order against my ex provided a superficial sense of security. I know full well that she will come after me if she wants and that is what is scary; I always have to make sure that I walk through crowded locations or out in open places to make sure that I am not followed. Adding on top of that is that I fear the true murderer will come for me; I don't know why they would do it as they are currently safe from prosecution, but it is an innate fear that I have.

News of my implication in the murder was spread amongst the faculty of the school. It was kept lowkey thanks to Professor JYP, but I expect that people are suspecting things. Some of my classmates have asked about my drastic change in both schedule and character, and I have been able to avoid the topic each time. They eventually gave up and just accepted the new me.