As a third year high school in Aoba Johsai, you wanted to continue your life safe and drama free. However, you didn't expect that that would change starting from a mere false confession to the famous captain of the volleyball club, Oikawa Tooru.
He'...
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"Aneki!" Kentaro shouted as soon as he saw you, earning a few stares from the members of the play.
Beads of sweat were forming on his forehead as he panted slightly. But more so, he looked really mad. As soon as people started talking about the post that Ume Norika and Oikawa's two fangirls took down after the confrontation, your little brother rushed to find you. He was more worried since you weren't calling him by using your emergency bracelet like you usually do.
Right now, your hands are shaking and you didn't have any energy left because of adrenaline. That's why Oikawa was trying his best to calm you down as your friends prepares for the play. Since he was a main actor like you, Oikawa was not busy. But you haven't had a proper talk with him and your friends because you were called to rehearse just after the outsiders left.
"Kentaro..." You breathe as you stood up from your seat, Oikawa shortly following after. Then your stepbrother angrily strode forward, making you shrink back because you knew exactly why he's angry.
Thankfully, Kentaro arrived when the culprits are gone, otherwise he might get expelled for real and he's going to have a really hard time finding a school to transfer to. It's a scenario you don't want your stepmother to experience since that would mean you are the reason why Kentaro's ruining his life. Her greatest dream was for you and him to graduate after all.
When he got close, he put his hands on your shoulders as he bombarded you with questions, Kentaro's eyes flickering with worry.
"What happened?! What was that post about?! Did that bastard really showed himself to you?! Why didn't you tell me?!" He was practically yelling, making the Great King's forehead crease. Oikawa was worried that Kentaro was hurting you, but you reached out for his hand without breaking eye contact with your angry brother.
"Kentaro, I'm fine. Calm down," you softly said, making yourself appear calm and composed even though your hands hasn't stopped trembling.
"No! You are not fine! Why do you insist on being brave if you're only getting hurt?! All of this is pointless, stop being naive!"
Your eyes trembled at Kentaro's words. Although you know it's not his intention to hurt your feelings and efforts, you still can't help but feel down.
"Why are you being selfish, Aneki?!"
"It's not like I was safe in the past Kentaro, I was just ignoring the pain and letting my past hold me back, and..." You couldn't continue anymore because you felt like you're gonna start crying if you do. Your quiet tone was in contrast of Kentaro's gruff voice. Because of this, he seemed to finally calm down. But before he could say anything, you walked away after brushing his arms off you, and letting go of Oikawa's warmth.
You were holding your tears from coming down as you felt humiliated and dejected. The fact that you were told that you're acting selfish after everything you gained hurts, or rather, your brother seeing your determination as naivety. He was the one who you wanted to understand your change the most.
It was because of him that you got the courage to do that after all.
Kentaro tried to reach out for your arm, but Oikawa placed a hand on his shoulder to stop him. When the angry boy flashed his death stare at the captain of the volleyball team, Oikawa looked at him seriously with a hint of intimidation and shook his head. You even passed by your friends but you didn't look at them and having to witnessed what happened, they also gave you space.
The only thing they could do for you was to ask the people there to give you privacy the moment Kentaro arrived. And so, your friends, Oikawa and Kentaro watched as you left the backstage. They almost all sighed in unison.
"Tsk! Tsk!" Momo shook her head as she stepped closer to Kentaro with her arms folded. "Are you aware of what you just did, little brother?"
Though he got talked to, Kentaro didn't respond back. He only clenched his hands tightly as he looked down in shame and anger.
"You warned me not to hurt your older sister and yet, you're the one invalidating her efforts and courage." Oikawa said bitterly, as he raised his head, making him appear looking down on Mad Dog more.
"That's right, Kyotani-san. I know you're just worried for Y/N-chan, but she's totally not naive, that's why she's trying to overcome her past." Chiyo added, Hikari and Akane both nodded vigorously in agreement.
"You don't know anything!" Kentaro shouted in anger as he recalled your mental breakdowns because of your traumatic memories. He refused to believe that you manage to change so fast but in actuality, that's because you only wanted to show your change and lessen the exposure of your vulnerability.
It's not like you're not scared or don't have doubts. It's not like you've easily forgotten your past like how you wanted. It's not like tears don't threaten to fall from your eyes when you feel like you've shared too much or touched hands for too long with Oikawa. It's not like you are comfortable with exposing your thoughts all at once. It's because more than anyone else, you pity yourself and thus aspire to be confident and strong enough to face the past you've been running away from.
Being caged in the past is suffocating. It's exhausting. And you who had a glimpse of what kind of happiness fighting for yourself and being confident brings, craves for more like a child who didn't know what being loved feels like until now.
You're just taking back the happiness that your past stole from you.
"In my opinion, you are the one who's scared here, uh—little brother," Mayu remarked, displeased, as she imitated how Momo called Kentaro earlier.
The second year student widened his eyes at the words he hadn't even considered. He could feel a deep pit in his stomach which was sickening. A fact he didn't want to admit. That's what he heard.
Wanting to be left alone, Kentaro immediately ran away from your friends. His mind in turmoil as he bumped into several people while dragging his feet somewhere empty. He didn't even know where he ended up, but he didn't care.
The boy was too busy recalling every memory he had of you as a passerby. Like the time him and his mother first visited you and Peachy when the trial against your rapist was on-going. You had a dead look in your eyes, your mouth wouldn't even open to say a few words and you were sitting like a doll.
That was the time you didn't understand anything. As a child, you were only angry at the culprit for doing things you didn't like. You couldn't understand the severity of the situation. You were a young girl who haven't even had her first period at the time. But every adult around you were telling you about the terrible thing that happened to you while acting frantically and devastated.
The cheerful and bright girl he used to know changed, but Kentaro couldn't understand why back then. You acted normal with boys the same height or smaller than you, but you fear the tall ones because the feeling of intimidation and fear comes back to you.
You didn't know when it started but suddenly, you were having panic attacks and you avoid everything that triggers your traumatic memories. Even laying flat on your stomach makes you remember how it feels to have someone on top of you. Cold water brings the memories when you would take a bath at night with a broken heater because he tells you to.
Your case is more severe and Kentaro knows this the best. That's why he's worried. But he can't see that those triggers are still within you, however you're happier now than when it was just the two of you. You were lucky to have met the right people all at once.
Your happiness is indeed the most important to Kentaro, but he liked it better when you relied on him alone. He doesn't even realize that he wants to monopolize you.
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Author's Note: I'm really sorry for taking too long to update this, but tomorrow I'll post another one I promise. Are my updates getting boring? :<
