YOU WERE SUPPOSE TO BE DIFFERENT/ ARON WRIGHT
My sobbings are each time harder my heart is beating a thousand times harder than usual my head is going to explode, goosebumps appear in my skin, I feel nothing but everything at the same time "breath, Lexie, breath" I say to myself. When I get back to myself, I look at him and I can't believe that he just here, he is not asking the question is not the first time that he had seen me like this, vulnerable, as I recover myself, I look at my hands and both of them are shaking, "Stop Lexie, Please Stop" I stand up and I go to my drawer and make a call.
"Hello" I say through the phone
"kid, why you haven't arrived" he says
"Yeah, sorry I feel sick, you already know I never fail you with this thing, but right now I don't feel good at all"
"oh honey, is fine, thank for calling me, take care of yourself" he hangs out the phone
I go to my nightstand and grab a black and neon green box, my hands are shaking and can't stop them.
"Lexie, you are not smoking" kai says like is ordering me, grabs my wrist to stop me.
"I'm not taking orders from you" and shake my hand so he moves his from mine.
"look at you, you are shaking, you don't need that" he says pointing to the packet.
"you don't know what I need, so stop" I look at him his blue eyes are different than what they were 10 minutes ago, and I throw the small packet at the mattress.
"so that is you great solution"
"No Kai, I don't have solutions, I don't have answers, I never know what to do"
"So what do you want me to do?"
"I just told you that I don't know what to do with you or myself, but what I am sure is that I want you as far away as possible from me, I don't want you to touch me again, I don't want nothing to do with you"
"are you serious?" he ask
"you think that with what just happen I want you closer to me?" I answer "of course I am serious"
"have it your way then, just don't come and play back with me because I won't respond this way again" he says as loud as possible.
I walk out of the room he follows me with his jacket in his hand, he pulls me to his chest and hugs me I try to fight it but eventually I gave in, he hugs me so tied and I feel safe again in his arms, but I can't be feeling this with him, I can't be this way.
"I am so sorry Lexie I am truly am" he says through my hair.
"Are you okay?" Anna's voice interrupts my thought and am glad for.
"Yeah, he is just leaving" I say as I pull away from him.
"You still want me to leave you alone?" he says, Dios (God) why are you doing this to hard for me?
"Yes I meant what I said before, this isn't going to end well and am okay with my own problems" he gets closer and caresses my cheek his thumb touches my lower lip and he kisses me and I open my mouth and I let go just because this is the last time.
"Bye..." I say
He walk to the door and he is face to face with a grown full beard, curly haired, brown skin guy... Joel.
"BEBE!" I yell my neutral expression is immediately change with a huge as smile same as him and run into him, and jump my legs wrapped around his waist, and kiss his cheek.
"Bebe" he says through my ear.
I get back to my feet's and look at him, and he looks to my back.
"who is he?" Kai says at me in a low voice once Joel goes directly to the kitchen.
"Joel"
"Is he your boyfriend?" I roll my eyes at him "don't roll your eyes at me"
"I don't have to answer this, but he is not my boyfriend, he is my cousin and he is the closest thing I have to an older brother" I let go a laugh that I was holding this is so funny how can he think this of me when I struggle with myself and I want to tell him but I know that it will be in vain.
"Fuck you Anna!!" he yells, and she laughs
"What?" what are they are talking about.
"Bye" and he walks out.
Joel turn to me as I close the door.
"what are you doing today?" Joel asks.
"Nothing" I answer.
"she is going on a date" Anna says for me.
"really" he says looking at me with surprise.
"no, I mean I will feel terrible if I go out and you are here all alone, you know that I missed you a lot"
"ohh no I am not staying I am going out with some friends, like hell I am staying in" he says.
The morning goes quickly with Joel visit, he is like my old brother he takes care of me and is nice is like Leon was doing it, he was nice and kind probably the opposite of me, but at the same time very similar, with his death everybody change my mom was very strict, she never said how she felt, but she laugh a lot, now she only cares how we feel there is not a single day she doesn't says that she love us, she doesn't care how we are, or how we look she tries that enjoy each day more but my dad become more strict is like he took my mom's place, so my sibling didn't get it that hard, not like Leon and I.
YOU ARE READING
BLUE
Romance"tell me Lex what are you afraid of?" that is the thing that I don't want to tell him, but I am so curious at all he was saying before that eventually I will show all my fears with no words. "I not afraid of anything, just go" I need him to go I can...
