Never Have Love At All (Las Mujeres Fuertes Series #1)

CHAPTER 24

"Bakit? Do you have plans to hurt me?"

Aza shook his head and kissed my forehead. "No, babe. I'm just giving you a choice. I don't want you to stay with me and then lose yourself afterwards. No matter how much I want to keep you, I can't watch you breaking because of me."

"You will not, Aza. Are you doubting yourself?"

He pushed back his hair and leaned closer to me. "I have no doubt about my feelings for you. I love you, Tallinn. That's so sure but I'm scared whatever future holds for us."

"Let's not talk about that. I trust you, Aza. I am not here with you, celebrating our anniversary if I don't trust you. If you keep on doubting our relationship, we'll be in trouble then." I said and walked out of his bedroom.

I heard him following me but I didn't look back. Binigyan niya ako ng promise ring pero parang hindi siya sigurado. Ano 'yon? Naglolokohan lang kami. This day meant to be so special and romantic but why did he have to say those words? I know, he's doing that for good but it makes me feel uncomfortable. Ayokong pag-usapan.

"Babe... Are you mad?" He worriedly asked and hugged me from behind.

"No," I replied and removed his arms around my waist. "I prepared dinner. Hope you like it."

I reheat our food before taking a sit. He sit across me, staring at me. I heaved a sigh and start eating. Naiinis ako. Ayokong magsalita kasi baka kung ano lang yung masabi ko.

"Babe, look at me..." He said and held my hand.

I looked at him with brows furrowed. He pouted his lips and then kiss the back of my palm. Alam niyang hindi ko siya matitiis kaya ganyan siya. I rolled my eyes and let go of his hold.

"Let's not fight. I can't leave if you're mad at me. I'm sorry if it turns out like that. Hindi ko sinasadya..."

"Kumain ka na."

"Tallinn, I'm sorry. Please, babe," he pleaded and then stood up to sit next to me. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and then kiss my cheek. "I'm not doubting our relationship, okay? I said that because I love you and I don't want you to lose yourself just because of me. Always choose yourself. Always, babe."

"Why you keep on saying na I'll lose myself because of you?" I asked, getting emotional now. "I can decide on my own, Aza. If my choice is to stick with you then I will. And, if I feel that it's no longer working then I will decide for myself. Bakit ka ganyan? It's our anniversary! Why did you have to tell me those things as if you'll gonna do something horrible?! If you're thinking it that way then why did you have to came to my life and let me fell in love with you!"

Right. I don't want that. I don't want to be in trouble. I don't want him to say those wordsㅡ Na parang anytime sasaktan niya ako. God! This is our biggest fight. Laging tampuhan lang. Ngayon lang talaga ako umiyak dahil sa kaniya at anniversary pa namin. Great timing.

"Babe, I'm sorry, okay? I am very sorry. Stop crying, please..." He wiped my tears and tightened his hug. "I didn't mean it that way. Okay, I'm wrong. I admit that. I'm sorry, Tallinn. I love you. Sorry na. Huwag ka ng umiyak..."

I exhale a large amount of air before I start eating again. He didn't say a word and eat quietly. I felt bad about this day. This is not good. After I wash the plates, I get my things to go home. He's sitting on his sofa and stood up when he saw me. I'm about to open his door when he grabbed my hand.

"Uuwi na ako. Happy anniversary."

"Tallinn..."

"Just promise that you'll be safe. Have a good race."