True Deceit

Chapter 22: Patton

TW- Almost violence, descriptions of injuries, some self harm implied. 

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Patton took a deep breath, slowly sinking down into the dark side. He couldn't help but feel washed in guilt and nervousness as he paced along the corridor, knocking softly on Janus's door.

"Janus, are you in there?" He got no reply. "Can I come in? I need to see if you're okay." Patton was still for a few minutes until the knob slowly turned, opening to reveal a very dishevelled young snake.

Patton couldn't help but gasp at the sight of him. He was normally so perfectly manicured and tidy, but instead his eyes were red from tears, his hair was mankey and mattered beneath his hat and his sleeves were rolled unevenly up his elbows. His hands looked bruised and black, and his chin was swelling were he'd been cut.

"What do you want Patton?" Janus asked. The patronizing articulation in his tone was long gone, leaving only the hopeless ghost of deception.

Patton slowly stepped inside, shutting the door behind him as their eyes met.

"I just wanted to see if you were okay."
Janus laughed without humour, subconsciously rubbing the hunger pangs in his stomach. "Typical of you. Always looking out from others."

He slowly lowered himself onto his bed and rested his elbows on his thighs, seemingly exhausted despite past seven hours of rest. Patton kneeled before him, lifting up his hand and softly stroking his cheek with the back of his index finger.

"Patton," Janus spoke, his eyes watering. He resisted the urge to melt into his touch, ignoring the loving warmth he almost forgot existed. "Why are you doing that?"

"I know you like this," Patton whispered kindly in response. When he'd seen Deceit relax in front of the bars, something ignited inside of him, something he couldn't explain.

Deceit shook his head, pulling his head away. "Get up, please Patton."

Morality frowned, but rose to his feet. The desperation in his voice stung.

"Okay, I'm sorry, I just wanted to check on you. And thank you. That was a very kind and brave thing you did, releasing me and Logan."

Janus lifted his head. Patton was being sincere, thanking the man who hurt his friends and imprisoned him in a cell.

At that moment his stomach growled loudly. Janus threw his arms around his abdomen, hunger dawning on him.

"Are you hungry?" Patton questioned quietly.

Deceit opened his mouth to lie, but instantly closed it again. He didn't want to lie to Patton. He didn't want to lie ever again.

"Don't worry about that." He instead chose to say. His stomach erupted a second time, and he lowered his head and hissed at himself.

Patton sat himself beside Janus, leaning over and squeezing his shoulder. "When was the last time you ate?"

"Why does it matter?" Janus shot back. He instantly regretted it, turning his face away. Patton began rubbing circles on Janus's upper back, making a soft, soothing sound with his lips.

"Shh, it's okay. I'm asking because I need to make sure you're looking after yourself. Can you tell me when?"

Deceit shuffled uncomfortably, resisting the urge to lie. "I don't know; Probably at lunchtime yesterday."

"Around twelve o'clock?"

"Yes."

Patton adjusted the glasses on his nose, his lips curved downward. "So you haven't eaten for over twenty-four hours Janus. You need to look after yourself better. I'm going to make you something to eat, okay?"

Janus felt anger growing inside of him. He didn't want to eat, he just wanted to drown in his sorrow and starve to death.

"No, I don't want to eat."

"Janus, let me make you something-"

"No, okay? No!" He shouted, shoving Patton away with his injured hands. He instantly made a short exclamation of pain, holding them still in the air. 

Patton stumbled into a stand. "You're badly hurt. Could you please let me look at your hands?" 

Janus instantly shook his head, retracting his fingers hastily. Before he could stop himself, he hissed a chain of dishonesty. "I'm fine Patton, it doesn't even hurt. I'm not scared." 

Patton slumped his shoulders, sighing softly. "I know you're not being truthful. Why are you scared?"
"I'm not." 

"Janus?"

"Stop it Patton." 

Patton slowly seated himself back down beside the snake, lifting his hand to stroke the hair beneath the snake's hat. 

"Piss off!" Janus yelled, shoving Patton against the wall with his forearm across his chest. He dug his left knee into his ribs, placing his hand around Morality's throat. Patton winced frightendly, before realising the snake wasn't choking him, simply just holding him still. They were both inhaling sharply, seizing for breath.

"I'm sorry, i'll leave you alone, let me go!" Patton begged. Janus immediately released him, giving him space. 

"I'm sorry, i just..." he allowed himself a few seconds to breath, his cheeks ripe with embarrassment. "I'm so sorry."

Morality froze on the spot, vibrating as he trembled. "J-Janus?"

Deceit sighed, opening his palms, his guilt slashing him like knives.  "You don't understand, i didn't mean to, i don't like it when people touch my things. Especially my hat. It freaks me out." 

Patton slowly began to calm down. "Why does it freak you out?" 

Janus peeled the black fabric bowl hat off his head, holding it steadily in his injured hands. "It's the only thing i emerged with when i was born into the dark sides. I can't help being protective of it.... I'm really afraid of being without it." He held his breath, waiting for Patton to tease the hell out of him. That's what happens when you're honest with people, they betray you. 

Patton smiled kindly. "Thank you for telling me that."

Janus looked straight into Patton's eyes. So this is what trust feels like. 

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Hi readers. Remember how in the Sander Sides video, 'Are there healthy distractions?' Deceit gets angry when Roman steals his hat? Just something to think about. ;)