Be My First 2 - Together Forever

Chapter 33 - Possibilities

  While Jack and Jack were rehearsing and getting things set up, I sat in the empty arena where the crowd would be yelling and screaming tonight. My stomach still had this gross feeling, and it just kept hurting. I felt like I had to throw up, but I tried not to think about it and the feelings would slightly subside.

After finishing a sound check, Jack came over and sat by me.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

I shrugged. "It just feels like the flu or something, but I don't know. I just- I.. don't know."

"Do you, um, think that-" He began.

"I'm pregnant?" I interrupted.

He shrugged. "It could be possible.."

I suddenly felt even more sick, and got super nervous. "Should I take a test then?"

He nodded. "I think you should."

"No, I'm not ready for a kid. Not at 18. This can't happen."

"Uhh yeah.. Tust me, I'm definitely not ready." He shook his head.

I had many thoughts. For one, my parents would murder me. Second, I'd have to quit modeling. Three, I'd be harshly judged by basically the entire fandom and media. No. No. No. This isn't happening. I closed my eyes. Just the fact that it was a possibility was freaking me out.

"Hey, hey. I'm not saying this is a good thing. But I love you and if you are, I'll stick with you. Okay? I'd never leave."

"Jack, it's not that I'm worried about you leaving. I'd have to quit modeling, I'd lose fans and my title as a role model, and I'd be judged forever. 18 isn't the right age."

"You might not even be pregnant, so just take a breath. It doesn't hurt to check though..."

"I'm suppose to get my period around today or tomorrow and if that doesn't happen then something is probably wrong." I fidgeted my thumbs.

He looked straight ahead, as if thinking of something.

"Okay, well, let's not worry about it. Until we know for sure, let's not stress."

Yeah, Jack. Let's just pretend like the problem isn't there. Good idea.

I sighed. "Yeah, okay."

"Are you okay?"

"You're just acting like it's okay.. It's not."

"What do you want me to do? Yell at you? It's not your fault. I'm not happy about it, no. I'm just not trying to stress you out."

"Exactly. I'm not trying to bring a child into this world that nobody wants or is happy about. That's wrong."

"Okay. Paige. I feel like we're taking this overboard. You really could just have the flu or something."

"I'm just freaking out because it's a high possibility, okay?"

He nodded and put his hand on my thigh, sighing.

"Whatever happens, I got you."

He can't stop his career and get a horrible reputation for this. I'm not about to quit my career either. That's NOT a possibility for me. I don't want to go to college. But then again, it's half-half. I don't even know.

I sighed and poked my stomach.

////

6 days later, I sat on the living room couch at Jack and Jack's place. They went to Nash's to grab something and then they'd be back.

Well for one, I know exactly what I need to do, I just am hesitating to do it. My period still hasn't arrived and it's actually really unusual for me, so it honestly made me sick that I really do have to take a pregnancy test. I'd much rather do this while Jack isn't home anyways.

I nervously got up and went into the bedroom and grabbed the plastic sack from under the bed. I took out one of the weird looking things from the box and read the instructions on the back. Okay, strange, but I understood.

Apparently I have to pee on this thing. Just the fair idea disgusted me, but I didn't have a choice.

So let's get this straight. If it's positive, I'm probably going to be in complete shock and lord knows how I'd tell Jack.. I'd quit my job, be looked down upon my both mine and Jack's family, lose fans, be on the cover of magazines (not in a good way), lose friends, and have this kid. That's not okay. Abortion isn't something I've ever thought about or considered, I'd never do that. I couldn't bring myself to. So basically this child would ruin my life.

But, if it's negative, worries free! Happy day. Then again that probably means I'm having some other health issue, and I'm probably going to need to go to a doctor. I have work in 2 days so I really need to get everything together.

I finished doing everything I was suppose to, and now I just had to put this on the counter and wait a few minutes before the it'd show the result. I'm going to ignore the fact that I'm shaking like a scared Chihuahua, and walk around the living room until it's been about 3 minutes.

I swung my arms to my side and aggressively paced around. This is what I do when I'm nervous. I have to be moving.

Okay. It's been 3 minutes. But I'm just not ready to go back in and see it. I'm not ready to face that many possibilities.

I slowly walked into the bathroom. I know what it's suppose to look like when it's positive or negative, so I should be able to tell right away. I squinted and covered my eyes with my hand, peaking through the little cracks in between my fingers.. Nervously moving my eyes.

I looked down at the test.

Positive.