EDENVILLE

Crime Fighters Gather

By @lyttlejoe

The finest investigative minds assembled in the Mayor's office to discuss Corky's demise. Fudge provided Lily flavoured ice cream served in black crepe cones and the Tiki Bar contributed a large pitcher of Luau Lazer punch along with a tray of cucumber sandwiches from the Women's Guild.
The gathering debated back and forth blaming Wilfred Bodger for letting the rat population get out of control. Then Espi Drille for mislabelling shoe sizes at his Heeling Sole Shoe Emporium. But Inspector Fellow, senior law enforcement officer put forth his own ingenious theory.
"Gentlemen, we all know of Corky's penchant for hallucinatory support. I hypothesize that Corky wanted to trim those Roadshow advertising folders we found and so stood on the pile - bare foot so as not to get them dirty - on the cutting board and inadvertently severed his toes."
"Brilliant!" Breem hiccupped, dunking his sandwich in the punch pitcher.
"But why put his boots back on?" Sergeant Cushy Jobb asked. "The folders still needed trimming and that just de-feeted the purpose!"
Cushy was asked to leave the meeting.
********
Meanwhile, in hospital, Milli was drawing what air she could through the nostril holes in her cast and blowing through the tube until a vigilant desk nurse noticed the monitor going into the red zone and rushed to Milli's room, breaking down the door with a deft, martial arts circular kick.
Milli's cast was removed by the doctor, still searching for his tie clip and the story of the mysterious masked man was delivered to the Mayor's office.
********
Milli was horrified to learn of Corky's death; it meant her article wouldn't be part of the news. She had to get to the station so she stole a wheelchair, fled the hospital only to steer into the road dips. A frantic wave to Porter who was holding his jaw, went to no avail and unable to stop, she roller-coastered her way down the street, past the station and out of town.
********
Back at the meeting, Breem had fallen asleep, his head propped up by the crepe cone he'd been eating. Mayor Maynot fingered a gold pin, worrying how the recent events might affect his re-election. Twila arrived at the meeting and introduced her friend Monsieur Pawro, somewhat famous private detective.
"Hercule Poirot!" The group exclaimed.
"Ah, non. Clyde Pawro,  Erkyl's demi-frère."
"What did he say, Twila?"
"He's Hercule's step brother Clyde."
"Monsieur Mayno I am 'ere to solve the cass of the meesing toes."
"And what makes you so sure you can do this?" Inspector Fellow asked.
"Monsieur Fallow I 'ave intimate knowledge of digitalis."
"What?"
"Digitooties."
"Mister Mayor this is ridiculous--"
"Your honour," Twila interrupted. "Mr. Pawro solved the case of the case of the missing link. He's qualified."
"Are you qualified, Mr. Puree?"
"Pawro, and wee, I am axtramly qualified and will 'astily feenish theese cass and I will began wit quastionang zee pupyoulace of Adanveele.""
"Twila?" The mayor shrugged.
"He said yes."
Beulah, with a wicked smile, placed a photo in front of Fellow of the borrowed tennis whites burning in the yard behind the office along with one of her in a racy pose wearing the gas cape.
Twila reclaimed the empty punch pitcher and returned to the hotel where she tried to get Ted . . . Ted the Shrunken Head's head back in shape with the soda pump in the bar.
********
Professor Noel Edge stopped when the little man in the straw Homburg asked if he had seen any meessing toes.
"What?"
"Meesing toes!"
Professor Edge frowned and said, "It isn't even Christmas yet you silly man."
********
Bessie sat in her garden, feet in a pail of Epsom salts, petting Boo lovingly, cooing, 'What a good Kitty you are'.