Our Secret Dream

Rekindled or Broken

SKYALR POV

I take a few deep breaths at the bottom of the stairs before I head into the studio where all the boys are setting up their ring lights. The boys watch me while I walk across the room towards Chris. I stop a few feet away from his and wait for him to look up.

Skylar: I think we should talk.

Chris: Sure. Lets go on the balcony.

I follow Chris outside both Dom and Tyler give me reassuring thumbs up. Tyler mouths 'Shout if you need me' and I mouth back 'Thanks'. We each take a seat outside and I stay silent this time waiting for Chris to take lead. He's fidgeting around in his chair. His thumbs going in circles. He looks up at me and I can't help but show the sadness and pain in my eyes. The pain and struggle that I was showing was reflected in his eyes and his body - I don't think until this very moment I'd believed how much this had been hurting him.

Chris: I am so sorry Sky, really I am. I never should have accused you of cheating. I know you better than anyone other than Bryan and I know you would and could never cheat on him. I was just letting my own insecurities of being cheated on cloud my judgement.

Chris looks away from me and out towards the hills. He pauses for a while giving me time to process his apology. I knew Chris has been in some terrible relationships and that they had ended poorly but I hadn't put the pieces together to show it was a result of cheating. Maybe Chris was just too much like me. We'd both seen and experienced tragedy as a result to cheating. He turns back to me and continues.

Chris: When you came down that morning and said you'd be gone for hours on a run I just freaked out. You'd always been so honest and open with me about what you would be doing and that morning you weren't. I guess the change just made me panic and you know the rest.

I take a moment to gather my thoughts and decide how best to handle this situation but I'd never been in a situation like this before so I guess I'm just going to have to make it up as I go along and hope that my gut will help me make the right decision.

Skylar: Before all of this Chris you and Bryan were the closet people to me in this house but a lot of things have happened since then and I don't feel like we are that close anymore. It actually feels like I've been in London this whole time and your still here. I've let Tyler into some of my past and I really don't know if I can let you in again Chris. I did that before and look where that got me. Tyler and Bryan are the ones ones who know the worst side of me and they haven't judge or looked at me any different. You've already failed at one of those, how am I supposed to let you in and see the worst side of me and feel safe?

Chris: I know I hurt you. Fuck I betrayed you Cookie. I should never have spoken to you like that or grabbed you the way I did.

Skylar: You were one of my best friends Teddy. A brother that I never had before and this last week has torn my heart apart. I want to give you a second chance but I'm scared your going to betray must trust again. I told you that I had errands that I needed to do while I was gone.

Chris: I know I just didn't listen. Being cheated on in my past relationships have fucked with my head and I just put my shit on you.

Skylar: I'm going to tell you something Chris, not because I trust you right now but because I want to give you a second chance and for us to go back to how things were.

I take a few deep breaths and look back into the house. All the boys are sat at the table talking. Bryan has joined them now, I'm not sure how long he has been down here for. I catch Tyler's gaze and he gives me a thumbs up. I sigh and give him a small sad smile. He nods in response. It's crazy that he gets what I mean by a simple gesture, words not being everything. I let a few tears escape me turning my attention back to continue talking.

Skylar: The reason why I got so upset and felt so betrayed was because I was mentally and physically abused by both my parents back in England. They would both cheat on one another and whenever the other person found out they would take it out on me. Sometimes it would be verbal abuse, manipulations or physical abuse. That's why I have all of these wall up and struggle to let people get close. I put on a front to people that I can free spirited, confident, self assured but the reality is that when I truly care about someone and let them in they always end up betraying me.

Chris: Fuck. I am so sorry Sky. I should never had said it to you. I wish I could take it all back.

Chris lowers his head in shame the sadness taking over his face. His eyes filled with tears. As sad as Chris is I'm proud of myself this whole conversation I have remained calm and collected. I look inside again, the boys are still chatting around the table. Bryan looks past the boys and locks his eyes with mine. I smile at him and he winks back at me.

Chris: I'm not sure I deserve your forgiveness Sky after everything you've just told me I should have just given you more time. I should have listened.

Skylar: Well, I've decided to forgive you and move on from it so you have no choice but to suck it up.

Chris: I have missed you so much Cookie. I don't deserve a second chance but I will show you how much it means to me. I finally get my best friend back.

Skylar: I thought Tyler was your best friend?

Chris: I think we all know that your my best-best friend. That changed from the second you turned up at Dream LA.

Skylar: Promise me one thing Chris, if you ever have any doubts again, you'll just come out and ask me?

Chris: Agreed.

Skylar: One more thing. There's going to be an announcement and when that happens your going to feel hella silly. I also want you to know that I never asked Bryan or anyone to pick a side. I would never had done that too you. I never wanted what happened between us to impact your relationships with anyone else.

Chris: I know Sky, really I do.

We both stand up and I give Chris a hug. We walk back inside and all the boys including Bryan scatter around the room trying to look busy. At some point they must have got up from the table and tried to listen in to our conversation. I look at Chris and we both laugh.

Chris: Very subtle guys.

Skylar: Yeah about as subtle as a brick.

Bryan: You okay baby?

Skylar: Yeah it's all fine now. We are going to start fresh.

Chris: Boys, I owe you guys an apology too, my actions put you all in a difficult position and I know you've all been sad and missing Sky this last week while she's been away. I'm really sorry.

Tyler, Tristan & Dom: Apology Accepted.

Chris: I'm really sorry brother. I shouldn't have gotten involved. I just forgot and let the lines get blurred but I promise it won't happen again. I don't ever want us to fall about and I never want to be the cause of the pain you went through while Sky was away.

Bryan: It's in the past little bro.

We all go our separate ways, Bryan and I go up stairs and get changed and then come back down stairs and take our places ready to go live.