Stronger || NCT mafia au

Chapter 71 | "brave face"

Jaemin woke up first the next morning, the bright sunlight streaming into the room from her window. He sighed to himself as he looked at the girl lying on his chest. His eyes traced the bruises littering her arms and on her face, memories of her screaming flashing in his mind.

He shook them away as he continued to stare at her, feeling her nuzzle deeper into his chest, a warmth spreading through his whole body. Smiling, he lightly kissed the top of her head before waking her up.

"Jihyun~ it's time to wake up"

She slowly opened her eyes, blinking sleepily as she woke.

"Morning, sleepyhead, how you feeling?"

"Hi Jaemin"

"Hi" he smiled at her fondly as she slowly began to wake. "Sleep well?"

"Mmhmm. Thanks for staying."

"Of course. Are you feeling ok?"

"About as ok as I can. My whole body hurts but I'll heal." She says with a small smile, sitting up and carefully stretching her arms. "Are the others awake?"

"I heard them in the hall this morning. It's 10, by the way." She turns to him in shock.

"10? I slept so late. Sorry to keep you here."

"'No dont worry about it, I slept too, it was a nice break." He paused hesitantly.

"What's wrong?" She says, noticing his change in demeanor.

"You need to talk to the others today. They were really worried last night when I told them what happened to you."

She nods her head slowly, a mix of fear and understanding lingering in her gaze.

"I know. They deserve an explanation. I need to move past this."

"Ji" Jaemin sits up, turning to face her directly, "what happened to you isn't just something that you can force yourself to move past. It's going to take time and we're here for you. You don't just have to put on a brave face, ok?" He cups her face in his hands, staring into her eyes.

"I-I know. But I have to start somewhere. I promise I won't just force it away, but I want to heal. I want to try and find my way back to normal." She places her hands on top of his, pulling them into her lap and giving them a squeeze.

"And we're here to help you."

"Thanks, Nana."

"Anytime."

- - -

"Jihyun!"

Sungchan stands as he notices her walking down the stairs with Jaemin. All of them are gathered in the main room and they slowly stand to greet her as she walks into the room.

"Hi guys."

There's a chorus of greetings from the boys as she and Jaemin take a seat on the couch. They sit there in silence for a moment, none of the boys quite sure of what to do.

"Are you ok, Jihyun?" Sicheng finally asks, breaking the silence. She lets out a deep breath before slowly nodding.

"It's going to be hard, but yes. I'm not gonna let this shut me down again. I'll be ok."

"Is there anything we can do?" Mark speaks up, staring at her in concern.

"I don't think so. I just want to try and go back to normal without thinking about...." she trailed off as the memories started to flash in her head, causing her to shut her eyes tightly as her hands began to shake.

She felt a strong grip on her hands, unclenching her fists and rubbing small circles into her skin.

"You're safe here. It's just us. You're ok. Nothing is going to hurt you." Jaemin whispers into her ear, continuing to rub her hands with his thumb.

She slowly opens her eyes, feeling her heart rate slow and seeing all the boys staring at her with concern.

"Sorry" she breathes out, all of the boys instantly shaking their heads at her with reassuring smiles.

"It's gonna take some time. I'm gonna be a bit sensitive right now but this will pass. Eventually."

"Take all the time you need." Taeyong says with a small smile. "We're here for you in any way we can be."

- - -

The nightmares continued. Every night it was the same bad dream, she cried and screamed but couldn't seem to shake it. Every night Jaemin came into her room and helped her fall asleep, her taking comfort in his very presence.

During the day, the flashbacks subsided. She didn't feel chills every time someone touched her and she slowly returned to training and normal life with the boys.

But she couldn't escape the night. Whenever she closed her eyes, the darkness returned to haunt her. The fear as fresh in her mind as ever even though a few weeks had passed.

Jaemin was the only way she could cope. She slept in his hoodies as his very scent calmed her slightly. He often would stay with her until she fell asleep, hoping to hold off her nightmares as much as possible.

She couldn't deny the feeling in her heart anymore. She knew that deep down, Jaemin was the one for her.

the way he knew exactly when she needed him. He always knew just what to do, whether it be make her laugh or let her cry. He made her smile brighter than anyone else ever could.

He made her feel seen. He made her feel heard. He made her feel understood and safe. He helped her heal.

Slowly, with Jaemin's help, The nightmares went away. She could sleep through the night with him beside her. Then she could sleep through the night on her own. Her trauma still lived with her, but it no longer controlled her.

He saved her.

- - -

They were all sitting at dinner, Jihyun sitting between Jaemin and Sungchan as usual. She was currently laughing with Sungchan and Jeno as Lucas tried to balance a spoon on his nose. Jaemin chuckled along, more focused on the girl next to him then Lucas' antics.

Her light laugh was like music to his ears, he found himself smiling whenever she smiled. Laughing whenever she laughed. He would look up and see Jeno staring at her as well, a love in his eyes that made Jaemin angry, but he shook it away, focusing on her.

Once there was a break in their conversation, Jaemin leaned down to whisper in her ear.

"I need to tell you something. Can we go for a walk after dinner?"

She paused to look at him, a curious smile on her face as she nodded, turning back to the others while Jaemin smiled anxiously, his heart beating rapidly as nervousness began to fill his body.