per·sua·sion

70.

The First Heroica header, as Jess would say, may look a little different, but we haven't seen a side profile of her. Hopefully, this one does her justice. It's also a little flashback to chapter one.

Jessica

"Kristen, answer me!" I demand.

"It's not important!" She fires back, "It won't change anything. It won't make you stay!" She chokes out, running her hand through her hair.

"Did he tell you about Bradley?" She tries to change the subject.

"He tried to, but because I don't give two shits, he didn't get very far!"

"He's in a coma, Jess! You put him in a coma!" Her voice is harsh, almost like she feels sorry for him. "And it's not just that," she clamors. 

"I don't fucking care!"

"What about his daughter? Don't you care about her!?"

Of course, I do, she didn't ask for this, but at the same time, she's not my concern. He should have thought of her before he tried to...

"Maybe I did her a favor," I shrug.

Kristen looks at me in disbelief, her mouth slowly dropping open.

"What!? I'm sure Maria and Adam will throw their money at it! She is going to be fine."

Not that I would call my so-called "parents" fine, but at least it's something, I guess.

"Just tell me! For fuckshakes! Isn't that what best friends do???"

"Oh, so now I'm your best friend?? Sorry, I missed that memo with you constantly screwing your so-called boyfriend's brains out and hanging out with Jo."

"Kristen, stop it! Stop taking low blows at Hero!"

I know what this is about. I've known for a while, but I also know that I don't feel that way about her. Not since Hero. And I know how shitty that sounds, how fucking unfair it is to her, but I can't help where my heart is.

"Stop acting like you don't know; just stop! I mean, do you think I want this? Do you think that—" she stops, "that I want to be in love with you?" she says softly as her hunter-green-colored eyes meet mine.

And there is the elephant in the room, the one thing we refused to discuss, and now we're out of options.

"I never wanted to hurt you, Kristen. I just knew," I bite my lip.

"I know you want him. I don't need you to say it; you'll always want him even if you die because of it," her voice shakes.

"Kristen, nothing's going to happen," I go to reach for her to comfort her, but she stands up instead, putting space between us. "Everything will be fine, and I can do this." She shakes her head.

"You don't know that, and if, or when, you die, what was the point of it all? He'll be devastated, I'll be devastated, and you'll be gone."

"I could die today; a stampede of angry fangirls could run in right now and kidnap me." I joke, trying to lighten the mood. "No one is promised tomorrow; honestly, how I'm still here is the question of the universe," I lightly laugh.

"Why don't you care?! Why is everything a fucking joke with you!!" She cries, "Please stay, make him stay, please!" She pleads, tears filling her eyes.

"I understand that you're scared. I do. I am too. It's been me and you for nearly five years, but it's his home Kristen; I can't take that way from him."