Spectrum 2

14

Grayson's POV

"Want to...talk about it?" Shane asks with concern written all over his face.

"No." I say, staring up at the ceiling. I haven't moved from this spot on his couch for the last two hours. I'm starting to think that maybe I could just stay here for the rest of my life.

"I've given you two hours to mope around. You literally haven't looked away from that ceiling in hours." He says, throwing a pillow at my face.

"Not cool." I mutter, grabbing it and holding it to my chest.

"No, what isn't cool is the fact that you're ignoring your responsibilities right now. Come on man, get up. We're talking about this." He says.

"Can't I talk about it as lay here?" I whisper.

"Fine." He sighs. "Tell me about it."

"I did everything right, Shane. I did everything right! The second I heard about the whole scare, I started being more careful. I bought condoms, I made sure she was up to date with he birth control...everything! I thought we were good!" 

"Well...it was kind of too late for the condoms at that point." He mutters.

"Yeah, no fucking shit!" I exclaim.

"Sorry." He sighs. "Go on."

"I don't fucking want kids, Shane. I do not want them. I will never want one. I thought we were both on the same page about that early on in this. I thought we were good! I don't have time for that shit. I wouldn't have everything that I have if I had kids. Neither would you. We wouldn't be where we are now with that factor built in." I say.

"I'm home!" I hear Sofia call from the front door. She stops in her tracks as she sees me shoot up from the couch and glare at her. "Oh, shit." She mutters.

"Shit is right." I say. "Why the fuck didn't you tell me?" I ask.

"Tell you what?" She asks, trying her best to look innocent.

"Don't play innocent. You know exactly what I'm talking about. You knew Natalia was pregnant." I blame.

"I did not! We both just found out this morning! I went with her to see Dr.Liles and then she went back to the apartment. It's not my place to tell you!" 

"Oh, but you can tell Shane all about the pregnancy scare that Natalia had?" I accuse.

"It was just a scare! I assumed that she would tell you eventually." She says.

"Well, she didn't! I had to hear all about it from Shane!" I exclaim.

"Well this isn't any of my business!" She says, holding her hands up in defense.

"I know." I nod. "So why the hell are you continuously involving yourself?" I snap.

"Listen. Maybe you should be talking to your girlfriend about this instead of sitting at our apartment and bitching to me." She says, crossing her arms.

The one thing about arguments with Sofia is the fact that I will never be able to win one. She is easily the most stubborn person that I know, and she constantly has to be right. This is different, though. This is my life.

"You knew that she had a scare and you didn't tell me! You told Shane, and I had to hear about it from him! Why the fuck have I been completely left in the dark here!" I yell.

"It was just a pregnancy scare, Grayson! There was no reason to tell you!" She yells in reply.

"Yeah, well it wasn't a scare! So while you guys spent so many days celebrating, she was pregnant the entire time!" I counter. "And now I'm the bad guy for telling her that she needs to get an abortion." 

"Yeah, you are the bad guy! This is your fucking baby, Grayson. Grow the fuck up! You're thirty years old. Grow the fuck up!" She yells with the most attitude in the entire world.

"Why the fuck would I want her to have a baby that has been drowning in god damned alcohol for weeks now!" 

"That's not my fault!" She yells, pointing her finger at me.

"You both need to calm down." Shane says, trying to get us both to stop.

"Shut up!" We both yell at him.

"You knew this entire time and you didn't tell me, Sofia. You need to help me now. Natalia can not be having this baby. I'm sorry. Not only has she been on a fucking bender for months now, but I have my own shit that could fuck up this kid. So if you want to be in our business so badly, help me get out of this." I say.

"You're so fucked up, Grayson. Are you insane? Do you even hear yourself? She is three and a half months pregnant. We heard the heartbeat. We saw the baby on that screen. There is no way in hell that she would EVER abort that kid." She says.

"I don't want a fucking kid, Sofia!" I yell.

"Well that's too fucking bad!" She yells in reply.

"Both of you need to stop fucking yelling!" Shane booms loudly. Both of us stop and turn to him, waiting for him to continue, which I'm sure he will. "Have you both seem to have forgotten that we live in a fucking apartment? Oh, and we're neighbors with you! And right now, Natalia is in that apartment probably hearing everything that the two of you are saying. I get that you're scared right now, but you need to be a fucking man and own up to your own shit. You're going to be a father. There's not getting around this." He says, pointing at me accusatorially. 

"No." I say, shaking my head. "I'm not."

"Grayson. What the hell are you so afraid of?" He sighs in frustration.

"I am on the fucking spectrum, Shane! Have you seem to have forgotten that little piece of information? I have a form of fucking autism! Why the fuck would I ever want that to be passed down to any kid of mine? I don't want that! I don't want to be a father. I barely found a way to show love to my own girlfriend. Now you all expect me to raise a fucking child?" I yell.

"I get that it's hard for you, Grayson. I've never tried telling you otherwise. But you're thirty years old. You are financially stable. You have an amazing girlfriend in the apartment right next door and you're making a fucking fool of yourself right now. You're sitting here and yelling at us, but we have nothing to do with this! I'm not the one who didn't wrap my dick up! That's you! Sofia wasn't forcing alcohol down Natalia's throat. That was her. And if the doctor already said that everything looked good...why the fuck are you so worried?" He asks.

"Fuck you." I say, shaking my head in disbelief. "Since when did you start taking Sofia's side over mine? You're supposed to fucking be here for me right now. You are too!" I yell to Sofia.

"Since I asked her to marry me. Since I promised you that I would take care of her and protect her from anyone that hurts her. And right now, you're the one who is hurting her." He says, crossing his arms.

"I'm leaving." I huff out, walking towards the door.

"Shut up." Shane says, stepping in front of the door.

"Move." I reply.

"No." He says.

"Let me fucking leave." I reply.

"No. You're acting like a child and I'm not going to let you leave and go do some stupid shit. Just calm the fuck down. We're done talking about this right now. You don't have to talk to me, but you're not leaving here until you chill the fuck out." He replies in a cold tone.

I let out a sigh and walk back to the couch, laying back down and staring up at the ceiling again.

Despite being mad at Natalia, Shane, Sofia, and the world- there's no one that I'm more upset with than myself.