Ben grabs my large purple suitcase from the sidewalk and sets it in his trunk. I have a problem with overpacking, and he didn't tell me anything about this weekend.
He tells me again to stop worrying about my outfit. Ben is wearing jeans and a t-shirt, I thought it was more formal than that, so I chose to go with my sequin skirt, oversized gray sweater with a tiny gray tank. My black tights have sparkles and I am wearing knee-high black boots.
I am overdressed compared to my boyfriend.
My nerves are on edge because I am finally meeting the people that he talks about. Ben loves his grandparents and I want to make a good first impression with them. I am planning on sticking around for a couple years or more.
Ben walks over to me and gives me a quick kiss. "Ally, you look beautiful. Please stop worrying. They are gonna love ya." He kisses me.
He opens my car door and helps me into the passenger seat. I buckle my seatbelt while he walks around the front of the car. When Ben is settled, he reaches for my hand and kisses it.
"Don't be scared." He tells me before turning the car over.
Nodding, I look out my window as he pulls away from the townhouse. Being outside of our bubble is making me anxious and scared.
Ben and I have spent the last month consuming each other while we shut the outside world away. For the last four weeks, everything we did was together and private. I was terrified to let other elements into our bubble.
I look across the car. "Where are we sleeping?"
We have not discussed the sleeping arrangements. If I need to sleep apart from him, it would be unbearable. I cannot sleep without him next to me now, I love the feeling of his hard body next to mine.
"I thought we could share my old bedroom. It has a full-size bed, so we will need to sleep very close to each other." He grins.
Looking at him, he is looking at me with a wicked grin and I finally start laughing at his beautiful face. Ben has a gift of making me relax.
Coming home with Ben was not a choice, he was very persistent about me coming with him or he would stay behind.
Last night, while he slept, I realized that I was madly in love with him and that terrifies me. I am scared because I am not sure if he is there yet, and I'm scared I'll freak him out if I tell him how I feel. Ben is the first person that I have allowed myself to fall in love with.
Instead of telling him my thoughts, I was bottling them up and it was starting to bubble to the surface. I'm fidgeting with the hem of my skirt, playing with strands of hair, and taking several deep breaths.
"Ally, your silence is driving me nuts. Are we okay? Are you having second thoughts?" He sighs in my direction.
My vision focuses on him, and I reach for his arm. "I'm sorry. I just have a lot on my mind. We are more than okay and I'm always having second thoughts." I share.
His chuckle makes me smile. "I'm a pretty good listener." He reminds me.
Rolling my eyes at him, "how long of a drive is it? We might not have enough time to scratch the surface."
"To Quincy, about twenty minutes, but we're not going there." He surprises me.
The panic starts deep.
My heart feels like it is going to explode from my chest, and I'm half convinced that I'm having a heart attack.
"We're not?" I ask him breathless with wide eyes.
"No. My grandparents live in Hull."
"So, you lied to me?" I snap at him.
With a damn grin, he shakes his head. "No. I didn't lie. I said that we were going home for Thanksgiving, and you assumed that meant Quincy."
Ben has still not opened up to me yet about his past. I know nothing about his parents, or how he grew up. I don't push him for answers because I know how that feels, but today, I needed something from him. I didn't want to walk into his grandparent's house blind.
"Ben, please give me something. Let me in." I practically beg him.
He shakes his head before playing with the steering wheel. His eyes are focused on the road ahead of us, he's stalling. When he realizes that I'm not going to stop until I get something, he lets out an exasperated groan and starts talking.
"My dad died when I was little, he killed himself and left my mom with nothing. She didn't handle it well. She found a liking to the bottle and the bar down the street from our house. My sister took all the responsibility of raising us and making sure we were fed. I hold a lot of resentment towards my mom." He says quietly without looking at me.
"Is your dad the picture of the man in uniform at your apartment."
"Yeah, that's my old man, but I don't remember him." He mumbles. "Around my freshman year of high school, my brother and sister were already out of the house, and it was just my mom and me. She found some dick to take care of her, but we didn't get along. Around that time, I started running drugs from my boys, Johnny and Mickey. When I got busted and tossed into juvie, my dad's parents took me in. I lived with my grandparents until I started school at UMass.
"Grandma is a real ball-buster, and I didn't get away with anything. I was working on the fishing boats after school and weekends, it was her way of helping me stay out of trouble. My grandparents probably saved me from becoming another sad boy from Quincy. I owe them my life. I love them to death." He smiles proud.
Nodding at him, I smile. "You have a brother?"
I thought taking the least serious thing to joke about would help him keep going and lighten the mood. I love that he is finally opening up and letting me into his life.
I knew he was a lot like me and did not let people in.
Ben looks at me with kind eyes and grabs my hand. "I do. His name is Allen, and we have a bit of a love/hate thing going these days." He kisses the top of my hand.
"Tell me more. What does a drug runner do?"
Drugs were a topic that I knew nothing about. I didn't even know what most of them looked like. Alcohol was the only thing I put into my body.
"Johnny and Mickey would sell them to their people, and I would be the delivery guy. They thought my size alone would be enough to scare people. Ally, I'm not that guy anymore. I've changed." He is looking at me with pleading eyes to believe him.
"I'm not judging. We all have a past. We all make mistakes and learn from them. Benjamin, there is nothing you can tell me that would send me running." I promise him.
"I wouldn't be so sure." He mutters under his breath.
YOU ARE READING
Heartlines
Romance*** Complete Story *** Allyson Sicard was in her final year at Harvard and while her roommates were trying to get their Ivy League boyfriends to propose, Ally was trying to figure out which law school she wanted to graduate from. Columbia had always...
