The Everlark Family: Book 1

19 - Special

 I didn't remember anything. I didn't remember why on earth I woke up screaming. I don't remember the dreams. I just remembered the loud, echoing boom of a cannon going off. Like the ones in the Games. But that was enough to set me off.
I shot up in bed crying. Peeta woke up, immediately trying to shake me out of my nightmare, but that only made it worse.
"DON'T TOUCH ME." I yelled.
"Katniss! Katniss it's me Peeta. It's okay." He tried to comfort me, but it turned me into a monster.
I screamed frantically, unable to stop. It became so loud, that I heard Willow's cries. That made me terrified.

"Katniss, shh! You woke up the baby. I'll be right back, one second!"
My screaming had stopped, and all I felt was a cold clenching panic. I was terrified. All alone in the darkness of our bedroom. Frozen. 
"Peeta, Peeta!" I yelled.
"Hold on Katniss!" He yelled from across the room.
I cried harder. Thankfully, though, Willow had stopped crying. 
"Katniss, honey, please stop. I know it's hard, but trust me, you need to calm down."
I continued to cry. I felt so ashamed.  
"Peeta, is this a dream!?" 
"No, no it's not." Peeta replied, rubbing my back.

I was still very violent, so I pushed Peeta away and walked outside. It was just as dark outside. But I didn't care about the darkness anymore. I couldn't control myself. I was a monster. 
Just as I suspected, Peeta followed me outside.  
"You okay?" He asked me.
I shook my head, rocking myself uncontrollably.
"Can I ask what you dreamed of?" 
I couldn't think of anything. Not one thing. I just sat there, rocking myself and shaking. Suddenly, a segment of my dream came back inside my mind. I shivered at the thought of it. 
"Willow." I said quietly.
"I've had a lot of those, too." 
"W-what happens to her?" I asked, though I was scared to know.

There was a long silence. All I could hear was the sound of chirping crickets. 
"She dies of mutts attacking her. . . Or she gets lost. Either is awful." Peeta replied. 
"I had a similar dream," I paused, "it's not that much about the topic, it's about the details."
"I know how you feel."
 My hands quivered, still unable to gain control of myself. "You--you should go check on Willow."
Peeta nodded, though he was hesitant to leave. "I don't want to leave you, but. . ."
"You can. I'm fine." I said. I just stayed there, staring at literally nothing. Just blackness. Letting thoughts take over my mind.
"You sure you're okay?" 
No. I shook my head. Instantly I started to cry all over again, like some weak little girl.  
"I never wanted this to happen. I never wanted to go through this." I said between cries. "It's insane how the Games destroyed our lives."
"They didn't destroy us. They did some damage, but we can overcome this--we have been overcoming this." 
"I'm not overcoming this. It all hurts."
"That's why you have me; I can relate to this. We were meant to be together, if not we wouldn't be here. We wouldn't have a family. Do you know how special we are?" Peeta asked me as he held my hand and pulled me up.
"Special." I replied as he wiped my tears away. "We're very special."