𝑇𝑜𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑜𝑤

- Chapter 7 -

// Trigger warning : anxiety attack

Fear.

Pain.

Betrayal.

Rage.

Suffering.

Despair.

Wrath.

...

These were the emotions ricocheting in your head like bowling balls. You heard cries for help, pleads for someone, anyone to save them. You felt death everywhere.

Feeling death was similar to feeling hollow. Like an ever enlarging black hole that would suck everything out of you until nothing was left, like it would consume you until not a single speck of light was left to keep you going.

Now imagine having to experience this during a war, a war you had no choice but to fight in.

It was sometimes a blessing to feel so much, but training to be a hero made you realize that it could also be a curse. It often felt like a cross you bared that you never volunteered to take, never wanted to sacrifice.

But you did it anyway, you carried that cross regardless. Otherwise the weight would eventually overwhelm you in an instant, you couldn't just let go or ignore it.

The cross of empathy however, was minuscule compared to the predicament your in now.

You are on the cold hard concrete, drenched in sweat and lungs heaving. Only for every breath to feel like fire dancing in your lungs and abdomen, it was painful breathe, painful just to stay alive.

Your eyes were hazy, and the sparkle and life they held within were nowhere to be found now, like the black hole you felt reflected through your hollow eyes.

There they were, hovering over you, with nothing but disgust and disdain in their soul.

A disdain for you.

The words spoken between the two of you were in pieces. Like a scratched record that kept jumping to different pieces of the song, or a glitchy movie that would skip some parts and play others.

"Why, why would you-"

Because you-

But I did all of this-

It- matter... you... no matter

"Ple-"

Why me?

...

You basically jumped out of bed, and began to hyperventilate. Your heart began to race and you were in a pool of sweat, you put your hand over your face to calm your nerves but nothing was working, all you could feel was the stench of death that left in your brain, and the sinking feeling that came with it.

Pain, pain, pain, pain. Pain

If hurt to move, it hurt to breathe, it hurt to live.

It hurt to live.

You shakily curled into a ball with your wings, and began doing the breathing exercises Melissa taught you to when you first had your panic attack as a child.

2 breaths, now 5 things you see.

3 breaths, 4 things you can physically feel

4 breaths, 3 things you can hear right now