Skinny Love

Chapter 13

As I opened my eyes I quickly noticed my mom was gone, so I turned over. My dad was gone too but in his place stood Nathan, Joan and Sam. Confused at first, I give them an  eyebrown scrunch. Sam speaks first and I lay on my back and start to sit up when I notice the balloons. Big pink 'It's a girl' balloons. 

"How are you feeling?" she asks.

"Fine?" I look around. "Who got all these balloons?"

"Everyone kind of did." 

"Hey," I look over to my friends. "I was planning on telling you,"  I joked. "had this big plan and all." Nat let out a breath, it came out as a small relieved laugh. 

"You scared the hell out of me you know." Joan said, arms crossed, her black hair in a sloppy bun. Joan was amazingly pretty without makeup, I wished she didn't wear it more often. 

"I wish you wouldv'e said something sooner, I love babies." Nat laughs sitting at the edge of the bed, "And this explains your ever changing moods." Joan adds. I smile.

"Yeah, sorry."   

By noon I was free to leave and was told to wait on a call about another appointment about the fibroid. When we got home Joan had to leave for work but Nat stayed and I didn't mind. Nat loved to talk and give advice even if it wasn't the best. After taking so many naps at the hospital I wasn't tired anymore, just hungry. Mom cooked downstairs and I was up in my room with Nat thankful that Sam had brought me some clothes to come home in. It was almost annoying how much Nat wanted to talk about everything but not quite because I hadn't really ever talked to anybody about it and it was like the words would explode out of me. 

"So that guy at the mall, your ex. Is he?" 

"Yes." 

"What'd he do then, that made you upset?"

"Nothing." I shrugged. "It's just we'd been best friends since we were little all of us including Sam but earlier this year she started to do other things like looking for apartments, being in college and it we really just me and Mark. But all we had was a skinny love, per say. To afraid to admit it and then one day it just happened, and we dated for about a month and I broke it off with him when I found out."

"Be he didn't do anything. Why'd you break up?"

"Because I mean I'm not going to take away his chance of getting away from his stuck up parents and going off the college, he's got his whole life planned out from the begining." I reached over to my pillow and took the blanket out from under it. I held it with a loose fist and then I subconsciously folded and unfolded it, just something for my hands to do. 

"But then what do you have at a life, Ellie? Working double shifts, caring for a child, finding somewhere to stay since you can't stay here your whole life. What about clothes and diapers and food?"

"I'll just have to work it out." I say.

"You should tell him."

"It's not happening." 

 He sighs, it was probably his plan all along to convince me to get help, but I don't want it. Maybe I should and need it, but I just don't want it. Maybe it's selfish and I'm being naive but if this is my life now I want to be in control. That's what you do with life right? Take control.